Please help me decide.

[Frambroysia]

I would like honest and sincere answers in regards to should I visit China for awhile. I have received a job offer in Dalian teaching English.

I have two friends there who have lived there roughly 6 years. I am in my 30's (a girl doesn't have to give her exact age), single grew up in Canada, lived in London, UK for 7 years before coming to the US to regroup. I have travelled extensively throughout Europe, Africa and India but have never travelled throughout the Orient.

Now... I am adaptable but teaching there makes me incredibly nervous yet amazingly excited because I know I will stick out and miss my Western ways. I am a tall, bonde woman. I know this shouldn't nean issue but will it?

I am serious in my teaching endeavours but what about dating? Will people look upon me as a 'freak'?

I am sorry about my ignorance but I am going to sleep on this. Believe me I hav thought about this for some time but there have just been a few 'signs' that I should go but will I miss the western world. I had the apprehensions when I travelled all over the world but this time it seems different.

Help... thank you for your time and not laughing in my fave and hopefully understanding my ramblings.

Franbroysia

[trevelyan]

Your post provides a lot of information about how you see yourself, but it doesn't provide much information on the nature of the job offered, which makes it difficult to know if you are getting a competitive offer, which is presumably what you want to know.

Things that would be useful to share: (1) is this a public or private school and how old are the students, (2) how large are classes, (3) how many teaching hours are you assigned per week, (4) what are your committed non-teaching hours, (5) other benefits like insurance, chinese language classes, visa coverage, airfare, etc.

Unless you will are being recruited for a genuine international school which has excellent credentials and pays close to western wages, your biggest concern should be checking out whichever school is trying to recruit you. Ask for contacts from former teachers and talk with them about the school and how it ranks in the Dalian market. Do not be afraid of coming to China and then looking for work once here.

Good luck.

[wushijiao]

As far as dating, look at:

http://www.chinese-forums.com/index.php?/topic/1347-%e5%8f%a5%e5%ad%90-if-then-implied4

The Western men on this forum could try to tell you "how it is", but at the end of the day, we're all just guessing (so it is best to keep ours mouths shut and refer you to others in the know ).

I don't think there is anything wrong with missing "Western ways" or Western foods. In fact, some people might fool themselves into thinking they could (or should) live in an isolated, rural village in order to "assimilate" or "go native". They might end up being miserable. Others might be fine with doing that, however. The point is, being realistic with yourself about to what degree you will want to eat Western food/hang out with other expats...etc is an important factor in choosing where to live.

My guess is that Dalian has a small expat community, but you might end up knowing quite a few of them. At the same time, it probably wouldn't be too hard to make local friends. I've only been there once, but the city seemed like it would be a fairly nice place to live.

It sounds like you have traveled a lot, so the process of culture shock shouldn't be too shocking. Still, it might be a good idea to read as much as you can about Chinese culture, and to read about the process of culture shock itself.

http://www.ncat.edu/~oip/cultureshock.htm

Good luck!

Also, I agree with Travelyan's advice about teaching/contracts.

[Frambroysia]

Thank you very much for the replies.

I am not worried about employment as my friends have been in Dalian for quite some time and are well respected within the education community so that is not my concern.

I appreciate your answers and suggestions to sites and I will definitely look at those! Who knows, maybe I will be able to give advice in a few months?

Your sincerity and answers were much appreciated.

[babygodzilla]

i dont think ull be looked upon as a "freak," but definitely be different. no duh. blonde, tall, pale skin, and (excuse me if i sound rude) probably busty by chinese standards. well i dunno how it is in dalian, but i havent seen a busty chinese female yet in the time i've lived here. not even in clubs, and i go to clubs quite a bit.

in any case, u'll probably stand out, which is not necessarily a bad thing. not at all actually.

GOOD LUCK! i wish you well, and lots of money (by chinese standards anyways), and a nice handsome, non-spitting-everywhere, boyfriend that takes regular showers everyday! oh and buy you flowers a lot

[anonymoose]

As a tall blonde woman, you will stick out no matter where you go in China. Be prepared to be stared at a lot, and occasionally have people trying to start up conversations with you at random.

However, Dalian is not a bad place to be. There are a fair number of foreigners, including many blonde Russian women, so you won't be alone. To what extent you stick out will depend quite a lot on which part of Dalian you are in. If you are in the very centre, most people will probably not take much notice of you. If you go a little further out (where there are fewer foreigners), obviously you will attract more attention.

By the way, the people you know in Dalian, they aren't R and P, are they?

[heifeng]

As a tall blonde woman, you will stick out no matter where you go in China. Be prepared to be stared at a lot, and occasionally have people trying to start up conversations with you at random.

Height:

Yes, this is very very true. I guess you don't speak Chinese which might actually be a good thing because you'll just hear people guessing your height alllllll day long for every single day of your stay. But they will probably be jumping behind you or conveniently walk next to you to compare themselves with you. Being tall is good, it's a bit intimidating, people will both be in awe and a little bit threatened and feeling insecure. People will make it a conversational piece with you, which is a good way to learn Chinese.

Hair:

On the plus side, Chinese people can't tell natural from fake blond at all, so if you ever get stuck in a styling rut (maybe can't highlight as much as you want to get rid of that mousey dishwater winter blond) you can go bright white or keep going mousey dishwater blond and be proud of your roots (ok, sorry maybe this is just me) Otherwise you may want to bring your favorite hairdyes if you want..

Busty?

(excuse me if i sound rude) probably busty by chinese standards.

Hey, not all blond's are busty, only the one's in American movies, and TV, and in adult magazines, and in LA, maybe those in novellas, in victorias secret or fredericks....sheesh..!!

However, if that is the case I guess on your list of things would be adequate bras. My ABC friend was very tall and busty (SO THERE) and salespeople would just shake there heads when she walked in b/c there was no hope whatsoever..(that was in Shanghai...bras actually seem expensive to me out here....but then again carrefore seemed to have some cheap ones..)

What to prepare b4 heading out to China

Shoes! Long pants. Cosmetics. There is a thread on this. Basically if you are big and/ or tall in any way whatsoever, bring that stuff with you!

Helloooo

I think you can also refer to the HELLLOOOO thread in which some other English teacher new to China chatted about being helloed 24/7 or something like that.

Apparently there are tall Russian women in China, but all the Russian girls I knew were not tall (booo, what a let down)! If you are tall people may try to talk to you in Russian since some slightly older Chinese peeps did study Russian not English. This happens to me quite a bit...

Have fun deciding. I don't think being obviously foreign or sticking out is really terrible at all. Feel like what a celebrity must feel like with the stares. To me the ONLY the down side to being conspicuous is that it makes you want to dress down a bit more which is such a waste of being tall....( I think short skirts on foreign women can result in toooo much attention, and too much of anything is not a good thing..)

[babygodzilla]

i know not all blondes are busty. im saying a non-asian woman is more likely than not to be busty by chinese standards. she may or may not be busty back home, but she's more than likely to be busty in Dalian, compared to chinese women in Dalian that is.

anyways... enuf about breasts..

[mr.stinky]

"anyways... enuf about breasts.."

you're not serious, eh?