How do you call an adult man in china?

[albert.wzk]

To clarify: Nowadays 小姐 gets a new meaning of prostitute, so generally speaking it's not good to call a girl 小姐. But in some circumstance such as the you told or in business communications, 小姐 is still workable as a respectful calling because the girl knows you are not calling her as a prostitute.

[liuzhou]

it's not good to call a girl 小姐

I think you are exaggerating somewhat. It is still very, very common to refer to a waitress or shop assistant as 小姐. I hear it again and again every day. No one thinks they are referring to prostitutes.

[fanglu]

it's not good to call a girl 小姐

So what do you suggest?

[HashiriKata]

So what do you suggest?

美女 ?

[randall_flagg]

I suppose 小妹妹 isn't all that bad (?!)

Well, it is pretty bad! First of, its not very respectful to address a complete stranger using a title that makes her so much younger than you are. Please, correct me if I'm wrong, but I can't come up with a way of addressing a stranger that would work that way (except, of course, for the 弟 in 兄弟， which I am discounting here). And, of course, 小朋友 etc for the kids. But even teachers in school (starting in middle school?) address their students saying 同学们你好 not 孩子们， 你好！

To maker matters far，far worse: what you trusted 文林 won't tell you is that 小妹妹 has yet another meaning. It may refer to a woman's primary reproductive organs. So beware!

Edit: Since this is in no way answering the original question, here's my personal problem solving/avoiding strategy when addressing an adult male: If you really can't come up with anything or are too busy doing something else, respectfully call him 您。。。 您好， 请问一下， 您能不能。。。 For long term prospects, you might politely ask him 怎么称呼您？How should I address you?

Edited December 13, 2008 at 10:24 AM by randall_flagg

[roddy]

To maker matters far，far worse: what you trusted 文林 won't tell you is that 小妹妹 has yet another meaning. It may refer to a woman's primary reproductive organs. So beware!

In the name of . . . if we're going to rule out all words that may possibly in some contexts be used to refer to anything with sexual connotations, we might as well all become monks and take vows of silence. Unless you've read the current Book of the Month, in which case the word 'monk' is also off-limits, and you're going to have to give up on Chinese and take a plane home . . . oh, wait a minute . . .

[randall_flagg]

Roddy, honestly, though, 小妹妹 is, in my understanding, primarily used in this context! I mean, this is not something you talk about to a lot of people, but I think 小妹妹 appears to be one of the words that people are at least somewhat comfortable using. I've never heard any other terms used for "it" in spoken conversations. Except for "小便的地方“

[skylee]

If you really can't come up with anything or are too busy doing something else, respectfully call him 您。。。

Useful suggestion, which was what 陳雲林 did when he met 馬英九.

[xieco]

>>小姐: The original meaning is "Miss", but currently, people always call a prostitute 小姐, so it's not good to call a girl 小姐 in chin.

同志: It's a popular calling for CPC memeber is the past (on/before 1980's), but now, 同志gets a new meaning of the GAY .

PS: 老板: In guangdong province, you can call every adult man 老板, because 老板 means rich person and Guangdong people like to call a man 老板

I still don't get it. As a Chinese native myself, I still don't see why 小姐 should be prostitutes. In formal situations, it's as neutral as Mademoiselle or even Madame, since 小姐 doesn't show her own marital status. I'm of course affected by my linguistic background, but on formal terms Hongkongers should use formal addresses very much like other Chinese.

*I'm unsure, though, if I can use 小姐 for close female friends in jokes. I use that even for students who aren't even "friends", but it works... in my Hong Kong context. So, there's a lot about regional usage. Understanding Chinese won't blame other Chinese for misusing a word, if that's not too serious.

None of my relatives, or myself, ever calls a man 老板 unless he's a real 老板(employer, businessman, tycoon...).

>>To maker matters far，far worse: what you trusted 文林 won't tell you is that 小妹妹 has yet another meaning. It may refer to a woman's primary reproductive organs. So beware!

Slang of whatever kind (say, sexual) is so numerous that you'd better learn it in practice. There are of course lots of words you won't use to a "second" person. When you say a young girl is sexy with your guy friend in a bar, and you are going to ask her out or something, then of coz you can use this term... just like "chick", in men's talk.