太太 vs. 爱人 (and many more)

[zozzen]

I used 情人 when in class, to try and avoid stopping the conversation dead by saying I have a boyfriend ;) I guess it's pretty old fashioned, but I wasn't picked up on it.

the use of 情人 is right.

In lyrics or poems, 情人 can be seen a lot. 有情人終成眷屬/ 是對青春小情人, 眼睛多麼閃亮.

But be careful, it also refers to private concubine in modern sense because 情人 is a relationship without any status or title (名份)

If a female told me she had 情人, i would imagine she must be fat, wealthy and successful business woman.

[zozzen]

我女人" (intimate tone)

I really don't think of this as being "intimate tone" as you put it but just one step up from calling someone your 马子. I hear this frequently used between males when they are referring to their "woman" or if said to the woman more of in a joking sense. If I said that a girl seriously she would probably smack me.

There is still kind of the "he's called me his!!!" type of reaction but that doesn't add up to intimate- it's a fairly 粗 way of talking about them. Typically seen in gangster/mob movies as well.

the term "我女人" is greatly different than "馬子" (horse---ride on it) . I've heard the terms a lot in interviews. An young actor talked about his family and explained why he got matured, because he had to take care of his child and his woman (我女人). e.g. 刘德华：做我女人很辛苦; 謝霆鋒: 王菲是我女人 (old gossip news~~)

The media reaction clearly tells the term isn't bad. And i couldn't imagine if these guys publicly say their girls are 馬子.

The term " 我女人" could be bad only if they call someone who isn't.

Btw, Cantonese measure word is very ....ample for girls. You can use 條、位、個、名 and....... 塊 (referring to er...) to call a girl and expect big different reactions.

[xiaocai]

Just some personal experience here:

太太: I have never heard someone address their own wife 太太. Personally I think 太太, along with 夫人 are for spouses of men with higher social status and you only use them to address other people's wives.

爱人: My dad would use it when introducing my mum to others, especially to his superiors and business partners. (He is over 50 BTW, so it might sound a bit old fashioned to some people.)

老婆: This might be the most common one used among my friends, IMHO.

情人: This will definitely mean "mistress" to me.

女人: Sounds like the man considers his wife as one of his possessions? Not a very nice word to me at all.

马子: Only have heard this in 古惑仔 movies.

[DrWatson]

To say 你的愛人 to refer to someone's spouse, even a friend's, is considered inappropriate or offensive in Taiwan. 愛人 carries the connotation of "mistress" in Taiwan. Teresa Teng's song 愛人 exactly meant mistress, or second lover.

That's interesting. In Japan it is also used to refer to a mistress.

[Quifore]

Wow, I'm almost more confused now than before I asked! I guess I'll just stick to 太太/先生 for wife/husband for the time being, and then learn the synonyms and nuances when I feel more familiar with the language. I'll definitely stay away from 爱人, though, as it seems this can have a lot of different meanings depending on where you are.

Thanks, everyone!

[Meng Lelan]

Personally I only know of one Chinese person that actually says that here on the mainland when introducing or referring to their spouse in conversation and even then I think she only uses it when talking to foreigners. I hear 老婆 99% of the time in introductions and conversations. Honestly hearing 爱人 just sounds FUNNY to my ears. But hey what do I know right?

I can confirm what muyongshi said above. I've only had someone use 爱人 once or twice when talking to me and I think they used it for foreigners because they turn around and say 太太/先生.

爱人 has always sounded extremely bizarre to me despite that I'm a Euro-Caucasian. I think because I mentally translate it into "lover" and I start wondering what exactly is going on there that they say 爱人, and I don't think I really want to know, and I don't think I want to hear 爱人 again.

[xiaocai]

I can confirm what muyongshi said above. I've only had someone use 爱人 once or twice when talking to me and I think they used it for foreigners because they turn around and say 太太/先生.

It depends. Watch more mainland chinese dramas and you will hear it more often than expected. Have a read of this and you may be able to find out why few chinese speakers you have come across used it.

[renzhe]

Wow, I'm almost more confused now than before I asked!

Learning Chinese is great, isn't it?

[jbiesnecker]

I can confirm what muyongshi said above. I've only had someone use 爱人 once or twice when talking to me and I think they used it for foreigners because they turn around and say 太太/先生.

It depends. Watch more mainland chinese dramas and you will hear it more often than expected. Have a read of this and you may be able to find out why few chinese speakers you have come across used it.

I hear 愛人 on and off -- I find it's most often used (toward me, at least) when the person isn't sure whether my wife is my wife or ... something else ... in a polite situation, i.e., 這位。。。是不是。。。你的。。。愛人？ (with all of those uncomfortable pauses), and when I answer that she is it's immediately dropped for 太太 or 老婆.

[trien27]

老婆 = from Hong Kong Cantonese for "wife".

老公 = from Hong Kong Cantonese for "husband".

爱人 = used in China for husband / wife not just wife.

太太 is not bugoisie! It's pre-Communist term for "wife": Usually a term for a woman whose 先生 [husband] is the owner of a house, etc..., in pre-Communist China.

妻子 is a Chinese term for "wife". 丈夫 is a modern Chinese word for "husband"

"娘子" is an ancient Chinese term for "wife". The ancient Chinese term for husband =

"相公".

內子 is a term which a man, from ancient China, used to describe his own wife to others, which was borrowed into Japanese. Sometimes called a "贤内助", used to describe a "good wife".

情人 = literally, "lover", this is usually a boyfriend/girlfriend, or someone you're not married to but might have sexual relations with, like a "mistress". The actual definition depends on tone and context.

女人 = someone a man wants to be his future "wife": this could be a lover, mistress, girlfriend, etc...

马子 = slang for "girlfriend", etc...

Edited September 20, 2009 at 01:10 AM by trien27

[renzhe]

I believe that 太太 was reserved for women of high social standing, married to a member of gentry.

Not wives of servants, farmers, etc. Hence the bourgeoisie connotation.

I could be wrong, but I've only encountered it in that context. I also think it might be less suitable for younger girls today (in their 20s).

女人 is "woman", 我女人 is "mah woman"

Edited September 20, 2009 at 02:08 AM by renzhe