Child Car Seats - Are they used in China?

[prephil]

My wife and I are planning to go on holidays to her parents in Hebei Province. We are currently living in Ireland and car seats for babies and children up to 5 years of age are mandatory. I know this is not the case in China but I want my wife's family to get one and I want it to be an unspoken rule that if we go anywhere in the car, our daughter goes in the car seat. Of course my wife, who is dedicated to her family, doesn't realy want to hurt their feelings but I'm pushing for our daughter's safety over her family's feelings.

Any thoughts?

[hunanfan]

I'm guessing they have their own car, because if you're in a taxi you can forget about using a car seat.

I'm like you, I prefer my kids to be in a car seat or buckled up, but part of living in China without a private car is that they don't get buckled up.

Just pray for their safety!

[BrandeX]

"No one" uses car seats. I have seen them in stores though, like Jusco, for like a thousand rmb. Here are some more reasonably priced ones:

http://search.taobao.com/search?commend=all&isnew=2&q=%B1%A6%B1%A6%B3%B5%D7%F9&source=search1

[jbradfor]

Are you asking how to get a car seat there, or whether you should require one?

As to the second question, that seems really seems to be up to your wife. You obviously want one (which you should!!); but if she doesn't support you, and force her family to use it, it's a lost cause. So you two need to decide this together, and agree together that you will force everyone to use it.

And I don't care that "no one else uses one". It's your kid, and imagine how guilty you would feel for the rest of your life is something happens. Some years back no one in Ireland used car seats either, and now it's mandatory; someone had to be first.

In terms of getting a car seat there, you can obviously bring your own on the plane. Alternatively, you might want to consider the Lilly Gold Sit 'N' Stroll. With practice, you can install it in a car in about 30 seconds (if the car has a seat belt!), which makes it great for taxis.

[imron]

Car seats? I'd be happy just to settle for seat-belts

[Lu]

I want my wife's family to get one and I want it to be an unspoken rule that if we go anywhere in the car, our daughter goes in the car seat.

I don't have a Chinese family, but it seems to me that it's not the best of ideas to walk in and start imposing unspoken rules on them.

First of all, you have to discuss this with your wife, explain to her why you find it very important that your daughter is in a car seat. I don't suppose she'll disagree on that point, since it is safer and this is her daughter too.

Then when you get to China, rather than telling the family to get a car seat, you could buy a car seat yourself. Explain to the family (better yet, ask your wife to explain) that this is safer, and that it is really important to you both that your kid is in the seat. Then you can insist on putting your daughter in it whenever she is in a car. To further facilitate matters, you can perhaps rent your own car, if that's at all possible, put the seat in it, and drive your family around yourself.

Edited February 23, 2010 at 12:59 PM by Lu

[xiaotao]

In Roman do what the Romans do. Your load will be lighter.

[Meng Lelan]

Car seats? I'd be happy just to settle for seat-belts

The OP is talking about a child's safety, not yours. And another thing, babies cannot use seatbelts.

Lu's advice was excellent. The OP definitely needs to take on the financial part of ensuring the child's safety, in other words, buy the car seat, and set an example by using it.

[imron]

Car seats? I'd be happy just to settle for seat-belts

This is what some people might call a joke. The laughing face at the end of my comment was an indicator that I wasn't really being serious.

[prephil]

I'm guessing they have their own car, because if you're in a taxi you can forget about using a car seat.

I'm like you, I prefer my kids to be in a car seat or buckled up, but part of living in China without a private car is that they don't get buckled up.

Just pray for their safety!

Yes they have their own car or at least someone gave them one I believe as a favour? I guess you'd call in guan xi. I've a lot to learn about that.

I remember one time we were going or coming from Pekin airport, can't remember which, and I went about putting on my seatbelt and the taxi driver actually tried to physically restrain me from putting on my seatbelt. He was explaining to my wife that there was no need. I think he got insulted when I did so anyway. Another petty annoyance I have is that when I return to China my wife returns to what I would consider her bad habits such as not wearing a seatbelt. I think some people never learn. For the first year here I always had to remind her to put on the belt. It's automatic for me.

Who's the patron saint of safety in a car? I know St. Christopher is patron saint of travellers so maybe I'll light a candle night before I leave and leave our safety in his hands.

"No one" uses car seats. I have seen them in stores though, like Jusco, for like a thousand rmb. Here are some more reasonably priced ones:

http://search.taobao.com/search?comm...source=search1

We'll be flying into Beijing. Can you recommend a few shops in Beijing (preferable close to central areas) where we might pick up a decent car seat for an 8 month old baby. Should I call her a child or a baby at 8 months? She's 6 months now and we'll probably be heading back in April so 8 months at that stage.

Are you asking how to get a car seat there, or whether you should require one?

As to the second question, that seems really seems to be up to your wife. You obviously want one (which you should!!); but if she doesn't support you, and force her family to use it, it's a lost cause. So you two need to decide this together, and agree together that you will force everyone to use it.

And I don't care that "no one else uses one". It's your kid, and imagine how guilty you would feel for the rest of your life is something happens. Some years back no one in Ireland used car seats either, and now it's mandatory; someone had to be first.

In terms of getting a car seat there, you can obviously bring your own on the plane. Alternatively, you might want to consider the Lilly Gold Sit 'N' Stroll. With practice, you can install it in a car in about 30 seconds (if the car has a seat belt!), which makes it great for taxis.

We will definitely be getting one. Have requested her parents to get one already and they said no problem.

My wife supports the idea but I'm just not so sure she'd say to her family "right, daughter needs to be in the car seat anytime we're going for a drive, no matter how short the journey is" for fear of coming across too cheeky or westernised or opposing their view - whatever you want to call it. Remember, she has practically obeyed anything they've ever said for 25 years so I guess it's hard for her to go back and dictate what needs to be done even though this is her daughter. She has agreed to enforce this rule but I think I'll be mentioning it most of the time, this and smoking.

[prephil]

I don't have a Chinese family, but it seems to me that it's not the best of ideas to walk in and start imposing unspoken rules on them.

First of all, you have to discuss this with your wife, explain to her why you find it very important that your daughter is in a car seat. I don't suppose she'll disagree on that point, since it is safer and this is her daughter too.

Then when you get to China, rather than telling the family to get a car seat, you could buy a car seat yourself. Explain to the family (better yet, ask your wife to explain) that this is safer, and that it is really important to you both that your kid is in the seat. Then you can insist on putting your daughter in it whenever she is in a car. To further facilitate matters, you can perhaps rent your own car, if that's at all possible, put the seat in it, and drive your family around yourself.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I agree with you to a certain extent but have you ever been to a hospital and seen the results of a car accident and what they can do to a child? If you have you would be enforcing this rule without any regard for cultural differences.

But I can see your point of view. I'm not the best diplomat in the world but I agree it's best that we sit down (which we have done) and decide on the important issues we feel we want control of when we go back and then convey these points in advance of arrival. Repeat on arrival politely just as a reminder and get into good habits straight away , i.e. walking out of the room when someone is smoiking with dirty looks on our faces and shouting about the importance of car seats.

That's a great idea about renting our own car. I must post a new thread on this subject or perhaps someone can point me in the direction of an old thread on this matter?

[prephil]

The OP is talking about a child's safety, not yours. And another thing, babies cannot use seatbelts.

Lu's advice was excellent. The OP definitely needs to take on the financial part of ensuring the child's safety, in other words, buy the car seat, and set an example by using it.

Good point. I think we should buy it and set the example. Cheers.

[scottishlaura]

If you have a car seat that you use in Ireland you could take this with you to China, all the airlines that I have ever travelled on allow you to take children's items such as buggies/prams and car seats IN ADDITION to your standard baggage allowance for no extra charge.

As for how you approach it once you are there, I am living in China, raising my kids here with my Chinese husband and his family/friends, and when it comes down to matters of safety I don't worry about being diplomatic. I just play the crazy foreigner card and say "in my country this is what we do and as the child's parent I am saying to you, this is what we will do here". Whether it be not smoking in my house (and expecting that people not chain smoke in an enclosed space with my children), always using car seats or forbidding my in-laws from taking my kids on motorbikes, I don't compromise - they respect my wishes or they don't get to have responsibility for my kids. Saying this (it sounds like I take a very tough line and am a complete b&*ch), my in-laws are generally wonderful and on these matters I have the full support of my Chinese husband so I never have to take a hard line, I am very lucky in this. But still I think for you the best approach is to decide on which points of child-rearing you won't compromise, in agreement with your wife, and then just stick to your guns, even if it means they think you are crazy!

[Lu]

but have you ever been to a hospital and seen the results of a car accident and what they can do to a child?

I completely agree that kids should be in car seats. My point is that you should be polite to your in-laws. After all, you're going to be their guest.

Also I think it's best to not shout at people. Not at shop people trying to rip you off, not at in-laws about the car seat. If there is a need to press your point, insist in a normal, polite voice.

[scottishlaura]

I should add that although few people, if any, know what car seats are for here in China, we have never experienced any hostility regarding our decision to use them for our children. The opposite is true, with many many people asking us what they are for. When they hear they are for safety many people then ask where they can get one. So if you explain clearly why you are insisting on car seats it may be that no one will question this, it's my experience that Chinese people LOVE LOVE LOVE children and will do anything for them.

[jbradfor]

Can you recommend a few shops in Beijing (preferable close to central areas) where we might pick up a decent car seat for an 8 month old baby.

Is there some reason you would not want to bring your own? It seems much cheaper, and you are guaranteed to have one that you like and you know how to install it.

[Meng Lelan]

prephil, you should use the car seat for the baby on the plane to China. Make sure the label on the car seat says it is approved for use on airplanes AND cars so you can have the child seated in the car seat on the plane, then you can have the child seated in the car seat in the taxi, car, etc. Another thing is if your inlaws went to all that trouble to buy the car seat then you should financially reimburse them for the car seat. As always, Lu's advice is again outstanding.

[prephil]

As for how you approach it once you are there, I am living in China, raising my kids here with my Chinese husband and his family/friends, and when it comes down to matters of safety I don't worry about being diplomatic.

Well, our daughter is 6 months and I think the car seat we have is 0-6 months. Just looked at it there. It’s a Graco model but couldn’t see any sticker that gave an age range. Anyway, I rekon she’ll be too big for it shortly so it’s time to upgrade. We will ask in advance about bring a car seat so.

Before I move on, how do you find living in China? Do you speaka the lingo? I’m kind of fascinated with the lives of foreigner’s living in China especially if they are the spouse of a Chinese citizen. What city/part of China do you live in? Is it clean? Do you miss home? Never been to Scotland. My sister was in Edinburgh and said it’s a lovely place. I would love to hear a Scottish person with a really thick accent speaking Mandarin. Och aye Li Xiansheng. Ok, that’s just silly. Haha.

I totally agree in that we need to sit down and sort out what our priorities are and just agree to stick to our guns on certain issues regarding the safety of our daughter. How do you deal with the smoking issue? Is it a major problem? I can’t stand when my father-in-law starts chain smoking around us. Really pi***s me off but don’t really want to say anything but when it comes to having our daughter around that type of environment, I won’t stand for it. But maybe they’ll understand our point of view. A lot will depend on my wife letting them know these things in advance.

I completely agree that kids should be in car seats. My point is that you should be polite to your in-laws. After all, you're going to be their guest.

I’ll try my best to be polite but if the message isn’t getting through I will resort to any means necessary.

Are you related to the dalai lama? Haha. Only messing. I agree with you that it’s vital to keep calm as shouting only aggravates a situation but it can sometimes be a useful method of getting a point across. Scare tactics.

QUOTE]Is there some reason you would not want to bring your own? It seems much cheaper, and you are guaranteed to have one that you like and you know how to install it.[

Just thought it would be awkward lugging around a car seat, baby and 2 suitcases but I suppose our daughter will be in the car seat so it might not be so bad. I remember one time coming home from China, travelling through Charles de Gaulles, a mother had 2 children with her and one was knackered tired and didn’t want to get off the plane. She just wanted to sleep away. You have to admire mother’s who can look after their children and remain so patient. Guess I need to learn from them about the gift of patience. Think It would be cheaper to buy a new one in Beijing to be honest but daughter needs something to sleep on in the plane. Maybe we’ll book first class and get beds. I wish.

prephil, you should use the car seat for the baby on the plane to China. Make sure the label on the car seat says it is approved for use on airplanes AND cars so you can have the child seated in the car seat on the plane, then you can have the child seated in the car seat in the taxi, car, etc. Another thing is if your inlaws went to all that trouble to buy the car seat then you should financially reimburse them for the car seat. As always, Lu's advice is again outstanding.

Good advice. Was looking at our current car seat but no sign of a sticker/label saying it’s suitable for a plane. Will keep this in mind when purchasing a new one.

Sent plenty of money to our in-laws over the last 4 years to cover the cost of about 250 car seats so I don’t think reimbursement will be necessary.

[jbradfor]

Just thought it would be awkward lugging around a car seat, baby and 2 suitcases but I suppose our daughter will be in the car seat so it might not be so bad.

We've done it for 5 international trips thus far. Don't be such a wuss! Besides, it's much easier at this age.

But for the car seat, you want want to lug it around. You can buy attachments that adds wheels to a car seat, so you can put your baby in it and just push it. Or, the item I linked to above is useful, as it converts between a stroller and a seat. Airplane approved too.

But think about it. When going though an airport, where do want your 8 month old to be? Strapped into a seat/stroller is exactly where.

[prephil]

We've done it for 5 international trips thus far. Don't be such a wuss! Besides, it's much easier at this age.

But for the car seat, you want want to lug it around. You can buy attachments that adds wheels to a car seat, so you can put your baby in it and just push it. Or, the item I linked to above is useful, as it converts between a stroller and a seat. Airplane approved too.

But think about it. When going though an airport, where do want your 8 month old to be? Strapped into a seat/stroller is exactly where.

Point taken. Will look into getting attachments. Didn't think about those. Would be ideal alright if we could pick up some. Cheers.