Touchy subject (condoms in china?)

[AlexanderH]

Gerri,

I'm merely playing the devil's advocate and didn't intend to actually sound like such an asshole. I made that remark because nearly everyone jokes with me about "coming back with a hot Asian wife. They're very subservient you know". I'm more than tired of hearing it.

Anyway, I'm more worried about getting into a relationship with unrealistic expectations on both sides ( or having no idea what to expect ). But at the same time I expect there to be a large population of young people in major cities who behave just like college-age Americans.

Either way, I'm not going for the booty calls or celebrity status, believe it or not ; )

[gerri]

Oh my, I see where you are coming from... have been encountering rather too many people, well ... like one who said he loved China so much only to be found animatedly discussing the price of a hooker (and whether she was worth it) the next day...

(So, btw, didn't take it as sounding like an asshole ;-) )

I hate all those comments which try to be funny, but are actually demeaning to others and even oneself. "Subservient," my ass... loving honestly and deeply, yes. Cunning and thinking strategically, yes, too! Subservient, if you find that type, of course. Bossy, too. Hell, people are people...

[Loriquero]

Get the Trojan 'Her Pleasure' ones, they come in a purple box and are slightly bigger than the other types.

that's my brand as well.

[Meng Lelan]

Have safe fun, kids!

[gato]

Pace yourself.

[Baggerking]

Cool thread.

Word of advice: Beware of the sex shops... I thought I would spare myself the embarrassment of standing in line with a box of condoms and go to the local sex shop (located oddly enough across the alley from the kindergarten... oh, silly Chinese society), and picking up a decent supply there.

I found myself at home looking at boxes of brands I know and trust that look, well, just a little different than before. Some cross checking with previous boxes (no, I am not a player, just extremely lazy), and I found they were all ripoffs and fakes. And the "English" they had printed on the labels... Haha... it's a real regret I didn't take photos.

Just a heads up, brand name stores for brand name products.

[anonymoose]

Just a heads up, brand name stores for brand name products.

And where's the Durex store?

[Bob161]

Does the "Great Fire Wall" block internet sex shops? Buy online. No lines, no weird looks from people in check out lines, and quality assurance.

[joshuawbb]

The "code word" is 成人用品 - "grown up items" or "adult items", and there seem to be quite a few online stores in China, from a Google search. Browse to your heart's content

[cui ruide]

It's estimated a third of condoms in China are "shanzhai"/fake/don't work.

http://china.globaltimes.cn/society/2009-11/483888_2.html

Best bet: bring them from home or buy them from carrefour.

Also, whether in a city or the country, I would say tread carefully in romantic matters here. Sure there are some "liberal" locals with more "Western" attitudes toward sex, but they're not exactly that numerous, and even then, their concept of sex and relationships--what are the responsibilities and commitments in a relationship--are still rather different than what I come from. You should also consider the repercussions in society for the person in question, regardless of their attitude. At the end of the day, you can always go home to wherever you come from, but they're most likely here to stay.

[AlexanderH]

Cui ruide --

Wow , that's terrifying.

Is carrefour a franchised supermarket located throughout China (Beijing?)

[putonghua73]

From what I have observed from many Chinese marriages, love plays a smaller role. It is more important how much money the man is likely to earn, status in society, how tall you are as a man etc. I was told by a Chinese guy, love is experienced when you are at university age and fool around, later you strategically choose your partner using other criteria

Once you hit your 30s, this attitude is not dissimilar in the UK dating scene - if only by degree. I don't think that there is anything particularly wrong choosing a partner based upon non-love criteria, providing that there is the potential for love to blossom.

By love I mean a mutual deep seated interest, respect and value for the other.

Oh. On the subject of causing girlfriends (or ex-girlfriends, to be specific) embarrassment, I remember food shopping with my then Taiwanese girlfriend in London, and I causally picked up some KY Jelly (condoms are next to useless without lubrication - and much less painful). When we got to the counter, she [ex-girlfriend] was mortified as the 'product' was picked up and rang through the till.

On reflection, there are probably more subtle ways to purchase such products i.e. man up and going to a Superdrug solo.

Cheers!

(who had to refrain himself from getting up at HKIA to dance around to the Apple Ad soundtrack "She got me dancing ..")

[Simon_CH]

I can confirm that even International brands seem to adopt to local sizes, I will spare you my embarrasing story.

Will definitely bring my own just to be sure.

[Erbse]

why don't you take along quality condoms? Buying them last minute in China is just gambling. Condoms are light in weight, just take as much as you need usually. Shouldn't be to hard to do the maths.

Someone mentioned Carrefour. I bought fake DVDs in a non-fake Carrefour in China. So much about them. I also got fake medicine in a Chinese pharmacy in Shanghai. I really wouldn't trust the Chinese on health related issues.

[Lu]

Condoms are light in weight, just take as much as you need usually. Shouldn't be to hard to do the maths.

While this is not bad advice, is it really that easy to 1) calculate how many condoms you'll need and 2) bring that many? Use of condoms is not constant. If you find a boy/girlfriend, you might run out very fast, or you might bring a stack and then have very little sex, or you might have a relationship that gets to the point where you don't need condoms anymore and rely on other forms of birth control, you might find someone who is great but allergic to latex... you don't really know any of that in advance. And if you do somehow know you're going to have a lot of sex, it'll be hard to bring enough condoms, because although they're light, they do take some space.

[crazy-meiguoren]

or you might bring a stack and then have very little sex

But if one doesn't get any, they can keep the hand from getting messy. Just sayin'.

[Erbse]

If you find a boy/girlfriend, you might run out very fast or you might bring a stack and then have very little sex

Then you bring as many as you would need with a boy/girlfriend. I repeat. I wouldn't ever trust those Chinese condoms.

or you might have a relationship that gets to the point where you don't need condoms anymore and rely on other forms of birth control

The only relationship where I can imagine not to use condoms any longer is a marriage.

[Lu]

But if one doesn't get any, they can keep the hand from getting messy. Just sayin'.

And is your suitcase big enough to keep your hands clean for, say, half a year?

The only relationship where I can imagine not to use condoms any longer is a marriage.

You might meet your future wife while in China. It happens.

[putonghua73]

I'm using Durex Ultra, which I bought from the UK, since meeting and now going out (relationship) with my activity partner.

I have enough to last me a couple of weeks or so (depending on how many times we see each other) but after that .. Hence, this thread has now become significant.

Depending on the relationship, and how comfortable we felt with each other, I would consider not using condoms - subject to us both getting tested - but there are ramifications with birth control methods, so Durex Ultra is the way to go (for now).

Cheers!

[gato]

The Durex at your local convenience store in Kunming should be ok. Don't risk it with your activity partner.