Silly question about chinese girls

[vasyapupkin]

Last time I was in Beijing I was approached by a lot of girls on the street. Some were plain hookers, some sounded very much like the infamous Chinese tee scam (very very cute, told they were students, etc... and very soon invited me to have some tee with them). I perfectly understand these two types, but there were others... at first, they sounded very much like the tee scam types, they approached me, introduced themselves as either students wanting to practice English or something. Were very nice... and did not try to invite me to anywhere, did not try to sell me anything. In they end we just said goo bye and that's it! What was that ? Was it the same tee scam that for some reason they backed off from or are there some nice Chinese girls that genuinely want to talk to foreigners without the intent of pulling some scam on them?

[Jones03]

There are a lot of girls that just want to practise their english without any bad intentions. Next time ask them what their major is ^^.

[anonymoose]

Yes, the unfortunate thing about the scammers is that it makes you suspicious of everybody, even those with no ulterior motive. It doesn't happen an awful lot to me here, but on the occasion that I am chatting with a stranger, if they suddenly ask do you like tea or do you like art, I usually just decisively say that I hate it, which doesn't leave them much room for taking it further.

[roddy]

Could have been either really, and very much depends where you are - university campus or Wangfujing shopping mall. I'm willing to believe that the tea scam girls are quite possibly naive English students who don't know what they're doing, and spending a day wandering around Beijing practicing their English is probably more fun than hanging around the dormitory, so maybe they're not that fussed about getting you to the tea house.

[Kenny同志]

I just couldn’t understand why so many Chinese girls are so eager to talk to a foreigner who is totally a stranger! It makes me feel bad thinking about that.

[anonymoose]

Chinese guys do it too sometimes.

[Kenny同志]

I don't.

[gougou]

I think most of them have the same reasons that make you come here; practice some English, help if needed, learn a little bit about other cultures...

[roddy]

You should Kenny, you'd be great at it. Wouldn't he, everyone?

[deathtrap]

What's this tea scam thing? first time I've heard of it, anyone mind explaining?

[roddy]

There's a thread for that. It's quite a long one.

[kdavid]

One evening when I was in Beijing with my dad in June we were walking back to our hotel after drinks. A young girl on a bicycle approached us and started riding around us in circles. She very bluntly started the conversation with, "Want to go for a drink?" My dad (newly divorced from his second wife), engaged her and started to chat after I told him not to.

In the end, I told her (in Chinese) to lift up her shirt and show us what she was working with before we bought her a drink. Upon hearing that, she said "Goodbye" and rode off into the darkness.

I found this bicycle method a bit odd, but a friend of mine here in Harbin encountered the same thing as well--hookers on bikes. I'm assuming this was a hooker, though I find it a bit strange she approached two guys with an obvious age gap. Maybe she's into that though....

[creamyhorror]

I just couldn’t understand why so many Chinese girls are so eager to talk to a foreigner who is totally a stranger! It makes me feel bad thinking about that.

I think this phenomenon is quite understandable' date=' but part of it is no doubt similar to the Sarong Party Girl syndrome that we see in my country.

[vasyapupkin]

So you are saying there are some chances that some of these girls did not have any bad intentions... interesting.

In that case there is a follow up question. Provided they really are just bored and curious students or something that want to chat with foreigners, how far I can take it? How would a suggestion to have a beer or something with them from my side would be accepted?

Next time ask them what their major is ^^.

Would not work. I got the impression that at least some of these tea scam types were indeed students...

[johnk]

It depends on who you are and where you come from.

I grew up in rural Ireland and there is was nothing unusual to have conversations with total strangers. On one of my trips home after living 20 years in the UK, I walked from my sisters house to the local town centre. Everyone I met said 'Hello'. I was starting to think there must be something wrong with these people until I realized that is simply the way it is.

There is an old Irish saying:- A stranger is a friend you haven't met yet'

I am not an expert on China. I did spend about 3 weeks there last year. I wondered around Cities and talked to anyone I met - male and female, young and old. Usually the Chinese person initiated the conversation - sometimes in Chinese and sometimes in English. The Chinese conversations were slow because I don't speak Chinese very well, but I did try.

I didn't think there was anything odd or strange about. I took things at face value and put it down to mutual curiosity. In general, meeting ordinary people was one of the highlights of my trip.

[Kenny同志]

You should Kenny, you'd be great at it. Wouldn't he, everyone?

Roddy, I should do what? Great at what? I somehow find your post strange and very sarcastic.

To Creamyhorror

Some of them are exactly Sarong girls, whom I would try to stay away from. After a second thought, It has dawned on me that I shouldn’t have been irritated so much, as that’s none of my business and they have the right to do whatever they want as long as it’s legal.

[Brian US]

I would definitely say the first sign is which area you are in. I went to Houhai for the first time last week and was surprised at how many services were offered to me. If you can speak some Chinese then you will find yourself having many friendly conversations with strangers that were in ear shot of you speaking.

[creamyhorror]

kennywoo2006: True that it's not your business what they do, but the phenomenon does have implications for the dating/marriage prospects of local men of whatever nation it occurs in.

The effect is even stronger in the US, where Asian women marry out of their ethnicity far more often than men do. Cultural observers chalk it up to the lack of positive portrayal of Asian men in film and television, and there is a social movement to support more balanced Asian-American portrayal in the media. (The same happens to other non-white ethnicities as well, of course.)

[anonymoose]

the phenomenon does have implications for the dating/marriage prospects of local men of whatever nation it occurs in

We're talking about Chinese girls approaching strangers on the street here. Some may be hookers, some may be tea touts, and some may just want to practise their English, but I suspect very few of this kind of encounter leads to dating/marriage.

[creamyhorror]

anonymoose: Fair enough, I guess I was extrapolating it to bars, workplaces, and interactions between foreigners and Chinese in general (which could easily lead to dating/marriage). It's just something that's starting to play out in Singapore, where a good number of lower-educated men are marrying brides from poorer countries while some higher-educated women are marrying men from richer ones (i.e. Western expatriates, as the conventional wisdom goes), and we have a glut of unmarried single local men (in the 30-34 age range, 42% of the men are single, while only 30% of the women are).

I doubt China will see anywhere near the same effect, but any significant increase in expatriate inflow will increasingly burden the gender and marriage imbalance there.