New Members Ateegnas Posted June 18, 2011 at 04:21 AM New Members Report Posted June 18, 2011 at 04:21 AM Hi everyone In the vein of 思考题，I'm also posting a translation of one of my all time favourite Chinese songs. Any comments/constructive feedback most welcome I haven't been completely literal with my translations and have taken a few small liberties here and there. I felt the context of the song could be conveyed better this way. But again, I'm open to any different interpretations or feedback Thanks! James 王立宏- Kiss Goodbye (translation) Baby不要再哭泣 Baby don’t you cry no more 这一幕多么熟悉 How familiar is this feeling 紧握着你的手彼此都舍不得分离 Tightly holding your hand neither could bear to part 每一次想开口但不如保持安静 Wanting to speak but rather staying silent 给我一分钟专心 Just give me one minute 好好欣赏你的美 To fully appreciate your beauty 幸福搭配悲伤 My happiness tinged with sorrow 痛是在我心交叉 A pain from the depth of my heart 挫折的眼泪不能测试爱的重量 No amount of tears could measure my love for you 付出的爱收不回 I’ve given you my all 还欠你的我不能给 I can’t give anymore 别把我心也带走 去跟随~ Please don’t you take my heart away 每一次和你分开 Everytime we part 深深的被你打败 I am deeply crushed by you 每一次放弃你的温柔 Everytime I lose your tender touch 痛苦 难以释怀 My pain will not subside 每一次和你分开 Everytime we part 每一次kiss you Goodbye Everytime we kiss goodbye 爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白 I realise the bittersweet taste of love [Repeat verse / chorus] 终于明白 I finally realise [Repeat chorus] Quote
skylee Posted June 19, 2011 at 08:13 AM Report Posted June 19, 2011 at 08:13 AM You might wish to note that the singer's name is 王力宏, not 王立宏. Quote
New Members emily xiao Posted June 20, 2011 at 03:21 AM New Members Report Posted June 20, 2011 at 03:21 AM 每一次放弃你的温柔 痛苦 难以释怀 every time let go of your tender,I can't get through the pain．Is it OK? Quote
思考题 Posted June 25, 2011 at 07:30 AM Report Posted June 25, 2011 at 07:30 AM Ateegnas, good translation, I particularly like this line: “每一次放弃你的温柔 Every time I lose your tender touch” I’ve made some minor amendments for additional lyricism; let me know what you think. I’M STILL UNSURE ABOUT THE IMPLICATION OF: “去跟随~” Baby不要再哭泣......................Baby don’t you cry no more 这一幕多么熟悉......................How familiar is this feeling 紧握着你的手彼此都舍不得分离......................OUR HANDS HELD SO TIGHT, THAT neither could bear to part 每一次想开口但不如保持安静......................Wanting to speak, but STILL KEEPING THE PEACE 给我一分钟专心......................Just give me one minute 好好欣赏你的美......................LET ME TAKE IN YOUR beauty 幸福搭配悲伤......................HAPPINESS MATCHING SORROW 痛是在我心交叉......................Pain from the depth of my heart 挫折的眼泪不能测试爱的重量......................No amount of tears could measure my love 付出的爱收不回......................I CAN’T TAKE BACK MY LOVE 还欠你的我不能给......................A DEBT I CAN NO LONGER PAY 别把我心也带走 去跟随~......................Please don’t you take my heart away, 每一次和你分开......................Every time we part 深深的被你打败......................I am deeply crushed 每一次放弃你的温柔......................Every time I lose your tender touch 痛苦 难以释怀......................THE pain, IT NEVER subsides 每一次和你分开......................Every time we part 每一次kiss you Goodbye,......................Every time we kiss goodbye 爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白......................I FINALLY Understand THE TASTE OF LOVE, Quote
New Members Ateegnas Posted June 28, 2011 at 09:06 AM Author New Members Report Posted June 28, 2011 at 09:06 AM Thanks 思考题!! I'm not sure what the significance of 去跟随 is either. I did a google translate, and it came up with just 'to follow'). So it seems superfluous to have it there. The only reason I can come up with is that it was added in to rhyme with the previous line and also to match the melody. It may also be to beautify the prose, but my Chinese is limited and I have no idea whether that's the case. I've added my comments to your revisions below: Baby不要再哭泣......................Baby don’t you cry no more 这一幕多么熟悉......................How familiar is this feeling 紧握着你的手彼此都舍不得分离......................OUR HANDS HELD SO TIGHT, THAT neither could bear to part (this gives the line a bit more oomph, I like it!) 每一次想开口但不如保持安静......................Wanting to speak, but STILL KEEPING THE PEACE (I originally thought this line may have been about not wanting to speak because he didn't know what to say.. like the hopelessness of the situation... But your interpretation suggests keeping silent to avoid an argument. Does anyone else have any views on this one??) 给我一分钟专心......................Just give me one minute 好好欣赏你的美......................LET ME TAKE IN YOUR beauty (this is better, I like it ) 幸福搭配悲伤......................HAPPINESS MATCHING SORROW (this is a more literal translation, but I'm not sure whether it sounds as good in English...) 痛是在我心交叉......................Pain from the depth of my heart 挫折的眼泪不能测试爱的重量......................No amount of tears could measure my love 付出的爱收不回......................I CAN’T TAKE BACK MY LOVE (now this and the next line I had a lot of trouble with. This is where I took the most liberty and translated it according to what I thought it was trying to convey. Translating it literally just didn't seem to make a lot of sense to me in English. Maybe the line itself just doesn't really make much sense to me, and I was trying to induce some meaning out of it. I like your more literal translation, but I also like my interpretation of these two lines. Does anyone else have any views?) 还欠你的我不能给......................A DEBT I CAN NO LONGER PAY 别把我心也带走 去跟随~......................Please don’t you take my heart away, 每一次和你分开......................Every time we part 深深的被你打败......................I am deeply crushed (I like this revision. Better than 'crushed by you' which is more literal) 每一次放弃你的温柔......................Every time I lose your tender touch 痛苦 难以释怀......................THE pain, IT NEVER subsides (this is much better, again, gives the line more oomph - I like it ) 每一次和你分开......................Every time we part 每一次kiss you Goodbye,......................Every time we kiss goodbye 爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白......................I FINALLY Understand THE TASTE OF LOVE, (ok, I purposely didn't add FINALLY here cause it's repeated again in the bridge and I wanted to give the repeated line more emphasis, not sure if this is the right approach. I added in 'bittersweet' to try to convey the context of the situation. But that's again subjective and I probably shouldn't have done that, what do you think?) My take on this song is that it is a long distance relationship. Both parties love each other intensely but the fact that they only can see each other on occasion makes each parting more difficult. It's almost an cry of exasperation at the hopelessness of the situation. There are probably only two roads to take after this - move to the same city, or split. And maybe the singer is at this fork road. Skylee: Thanks for pointing out to me my typo, can't believe I made that mistake... lol Emily: thanks for your suggestion James Quote
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