Translation ... Use of chengyu ...

[gato]

OK here is an example. The original text is "Quality assurance and enhancement is built on an ongoing cycle." The translation is "質素保證和提升，周而復始，循環不斷。" Look at the last eight words! It is good, but I want it plainer.

I would just translate it as "质量保证和改进需要不停的努力”, unless "cycle" is a technical term that needs to be translated literally.

I'm annoyed by flowery language in both English and Chinese. It's more cultural than a matter of language. The language used in North Korean news reports, for instance, seems a lot more more flowery than South Korean ones, just basing on appearance and occasional translations.

[skylee]

"Cycle" there is not a technical term but it needs to be translated in that context as it is about "closing the loop" with feedback collected. Think "plan do check act".

 

Can't you delegate it to someone who enjoys it more than you do?

I wish I could. The only person to whom I could "delegate" work has no idea that "scholarship" can mean something other than 獎學金.

PS - the author of this document has also used the word "brief" to mean "responsibility" and the translator got it wrong too. An organisation has a brief to do something. This is not very common, is it?

[陳德聰]

I have never seen that usage of "brief". If I read that sentence I would assume it was an error. I understand that "briefing" can refer to specific instructions but "having a brief" is not something I have ever encountered.

 

As for 循环的周期... I'm not in love with this translation either. Doesn't 周期 refer to a period of time? In the original "Quality assurance and enhancement is built on an ongoing cycle", the cycle refers to the process of planning, doing, checking, acting, planning... etc. doesn't it? Here I would have translated it as 连续不断的循环. Though a bit "cliche", so is talking production as an ongoing cycle.

I'm a bit confused, usually reviewers for translation are also translators, are they not?

[johnk]

An organisation has a brief to do something. This is not very common, is it?

 

 

This usage of brief is not unheard of in the UK - especially in politics.

eg

It is common to hear politicians say something like "This is not within my brief" or "It is within the Education Minister's brief to ensure that all children get an education".

[skylee]

The current translation has been reviewed by a translator already. The version I am reading is a marked-up copy processed by two translators. I am the client. I read both languages (most of us do) so I am vetting the translation.

[陳德聰]

It seems you should be paying a group that mixes native speakers of both languages so that you don't have to be so bothered by the end result.

[skylee]

Re the word "scholarship".  In the press release below,  "extraordinary, world-class scholarship" = "非凡學養". I think this is pretty good.  I wonder if our translators would translate that to 世界級獎學金.

 

Englsih - http://www.hku.hk/press/news_detail_10594.html

 

Chinese - http://www.hku.hk/press/c_news_detail_10594.html

 

I think generally the Chinese version of the press release is quite good.  I am not sure which is the original version.

[Lu]

 

I think generally the Chinese version of the press release is quite good.  I am not sure which is the original version.

If I would be responsible for press releases and their translation, and working for the university, I'd translate quite loosely. I'd make sure all the relevant information was there, but I would cut overly flowery sentences from the English, perhaps add something that wasn't in the Chinese, whatever makes for a nice press release and conveys what the reader needs to know. This is an area where you don't need to translate every word or even every sentence.

[gato]

"Professor Jao has served in the Chinese Department at the University of Hong Kong as Lecturer, Senior Lecturer and Professor, and today remains its Honorary Professor.

任教於香港大學中文系期間，歷任講師、高級講師和教授等職，現任港大中文學院名譽教授"

Grammatical error in the English. "Has served" means he still continues to serve as lecturer, senior lecturer, and professor at HKU, which he clearly does not. The Chinese version used 历任.

[Guest realmayo]

Not sure I see the error in the English.

[li3wei1]

Gato: 'has been serving' would have that meaning, but 'has served' means he has stopped serving in those capacities. 'I have lived in three different countries' does not imply that I'm still living in all three of them.

[gato]

He no longer holds any of those positions listed. He appears to hold only an honorary position at the school at the moment.

[Lu]

 

Grammatical error in the English. "Has served" means he still continues to serve as lecturer, senior lecturer, and professor at HKU, which he clearly does not.

I'm not a native speaker, but I think this is correct and Gato is wrong. 'I have moved to London' means I still live in London, 'I have been a lecturer for five years' means I still am a lecturer, but 'I have studied in Beijing and Taipei' doesn't necessarily mean I'm still studying there. I think 'has served' is slightly more formal than 'used to serve', and correct here.

[gato]

Maybe this is an instance of the so-called present perfect for life experience. Isn't there a slippery slope somewhere?

http://www.oneworldofenglish.com/english_grammar_reference/present_perfect_experience_in_your_life.htm

[陳德聰]

This isn't really an English grammar forum, but yes. If I recall correctly, it depends on the verb class. Stative verbs obligatorily give the "started before, still happening right now" feeling e.g. I have known, and then telic verbs get the "completed action" feeling e.g. I have built the tallest building in the world, I have moved to London, and the verbs that do what you're calling life experience are the atelic verbs e.g. I have studied Chinese, I have sung a ballad.

I haven't looked into it at all, but I think Chinese doesn't mark these distinctions any more explicitly than English does.

[skylee]

Yesterday I had to vet some translation (E -> C), again. It was an annual routine, meaning that basically we updated the English text, got the text approved, and then the translators updated the Chinese text based on the approved English version.

And I came across a very problematic Chinese sentence with a chengyu. I can't really quote the text. But let's say there was a sentence saying that a university has been given money to enhance its teaching and learning. And the Chinese translation went something like 撥款讓該大學可以教學相長.

It had to be one of the most disappointing translations in my career of doing such vetting. The wrong use of 教學相長 was quite unacceptable. And the English text was not even new stuff. And it had gotten through all the previous vetting to appear in the proof that landed on my desk. It was super disappointing.

Sorry if this post does not add value to this thread.