Improving my grammar structures :)

[lwstl4ke]

Hey, I was wondering if anyone could help me check my grammar? I've written a piece that a friend and I have to read as a dialogue to my Chinese class; and I was wondering if someone could check it. I've written out an English translation as then you can see what I meant when I've gone wrong and I've put the parts in which I think I might have translated wrong or used incorrect grammar in red; and also because the grammar structures are meant to be varied, I've underlined and italicised the main ones as I want to try and keep the structure the same, and just correct the grammar or words. I hope it isn't too bad Thanks in advance. Also if anyone wants a language partner, I speak English fluently and I need help with my Mandarin. x

Here goes:

W: 我打算来中国旅游。 请问， 什么都市来比较有意思？ 中国这么大， 游览一定挺复杂吧？

W: I am planning to go travelling in China. Can I ask, which cities are interesting to come to? China is very big, so sightseeing must be very complicated.

L: 没错儿。 你想去那儿就去那儿。 从北到南，各个地方有美丽的景色。 对我来说， 上海是中国漂亮的城市之一。你说汉语得很流利啊! 你不是英国人！

L: Right. You can go wherever you want to. From the north to the south, every place has beautiful scenery. In my opinion, Shanghai is one of the most beautiful cities. You speak Chinese very well, you can't be English!

W: 啊，哪里哪里, 我二年学汉语。 我每天练习练习， 我汉语就流利起来了. 我听说上海很热闹， 我不但想游览， 而且想了解中国文化。 我什么时候应该去来？

W: Ah, thank you. I've been studying Chinese for two years. Every day I practice and my Chinese becomes more fluent. I hear Shanghai is a very lively city, I not only want to tour; I also want to understand Chinese culture. Which time should I go?

L: 因为你既想参观中国丽的城市, 又想体验中国习俗， 所以最好秋天来中国，过中秋节。

L: Since you not only want to see China's beautiful cities, but also want to experience Chinese traditions, then you would be best to go in autumn and you can celebrate Mid-Autumn Festival.

W: 啊，中秋节我不知道。 中秋节跟圣诞节一样有名的？

W: Ah, I don't know Mid-Autumn Festival, is Mid-Autumn Festival as well known as Christmas?

L: 是啊， 对中国人来说， 中秋节是真有名的节日！ 你们在英国怎么过圣诞节？

L: Why yes, To Chinese people, Mid-Autumn Festival is an extremely well known festival! How do you celebrate Christmas in England?

W: Something about Xmas (我的朋友还没有写过这个句话) (My friend hasn't written this part yet)

L: 圣诞节在英国好像这么可爱。 我现在正在想象圣诞节呢： 刮着风， 下雪, 热热地燃烧着火. 人人都打开着礼物。 啊， 只要我学得认真， 就去英国跟你过圣诞节！

L: Christmas in England seems really lovely. I now am imagining Christmas: the blowing wind, snow falling, the fire burning warmly, everyone opening presents. Oh, If I study very hard, then I will come to England to celebrate Christmas with you!

[yellowpower]

check out this book:

Common Chinese Patterns 330

simple explanations, usage examples and speech patterns...it's not perfect but think it's concise and easy to use..

maybe others can share.

[WestTexas]

reminds me of my Chinese class in US... making you drill grammar patterns over and over again in artificial contexts. My own grammar is not that good, but until someone who has good Chinese comes along and helps you I'll have a try.

我不但想游览， 而且想了解中国文化

I think you should have a 也 after 而且

我现在正在想象圣诞节呢： 刮着风，下雪，热热地燃烧着火。人人都打开着礼物

I think you could axe all the 着s in this sentence. Also, the part before the colon sounds unpleasant to me. I think you should axe 呢, but the clause itself sounds bad too.

既想参观中国丽的城市, 又想体验中国习俗

I think 既。。。又。。。　is used with two adjectives. Maybe you could use it here but looking at some examples they all seem to be used with two adjectives. IMO the 不但。。。而且。。。structure would work better in this sentence

I didn't look that closely at the rest. 各个地方有美丽的景色, for every place you want to use 每个地方, and you will need a 都, so I think here you should change this to 每个地方都有美丽的景色. Maybe 各地都有美丽的景色 works also, translating to something like "All over the country there is beautiful scenery."

[tommy198883]

Aha, It's so happy to see so many foreigner suffering from learning Chinese as I'm also suffering from learning English. You know, as a native Chinese speaker, seeing so many of you are learning my mother tongue and be confused so much as I'm also confused and tortured by your mother tongue which makes me so comfortable. And today，you know? I was forced by my parents to memorize English vocabulary for a whole day. Oh, I know my English sucks, don't bother the mistakes I've made in my sentences.

I think your Chinese is so good, not too many mistakes in your dialogue. Just some suggestions.

W: 我打算来中国旅游。 请问， 什么都市来比较有意思？"都市"? metropolis? no, “城市” is better.

你说汉语得很流利啊! Should be "你汉语说得很流利啊！" 你不是英国人！If you are an English, how can we say you are not an English? You should say “不像是个英国人说的”.

W: 啊，哪里哪里, 我二年学汉语。“二”？Like you are insulting somebody. The correct is "我学了两年汉语", Remember always use “两” instead of “二” when you are expressing the meaning like "There are two of something".

L: 圣诞节在英国好像这么可爱。?? I'm so confused... "圣诞节" cannot be "可爱".. you should say "听起来英国的圣诞节很好玩啊".

And some of WestTexas' suggestions are also helpful. "各地都有美丽的景色" is the best translation for your sentence.

And there are other tiny mistakes in your sentences but that doesn't matter. The biggest problem of your sentence is that they are not native enough. You know? when a Chinese student is writing an English article, he will be often criticized by his teacher that his article is so Chinglish for not using conjunctions. Because Chinese seldom use conjunctions. Be precisely, they usually omit some conjunctions (不但...而且...，即...又...，they're conjunctions, right? I'm not sure). For example, we don't say "因为你既想参观中国(美)丽的城市, 又想体验中国习俗， 所以最好秋天来中国", we say "你又想看看中国美丽的城市，又想体验中国的习俗啊，那你最好秋天来（“中国” should be omitted here）".

OK，that's some suggestions. I hope it will be helpful for improving your Chinese. And if I've made some mistakes in English, I also hope you can figure it out, thanks a lot. I hope we can help each other : ) .

If you want more advises about Chinese, you can contact me using QQ. Do you have a QQ number? As you're studying Chinese, I think you must have one. Because most Chinese use QQ instead of MSN or other, I think you've already known that.

My QQ number is 175408211. When you're adding me as your QQ friend, please note "Chinese Forum, help each other". Thanks.