Jump to content
Chinese-Forums
  • Sign Up

Question on new tattoo grammar


crrose72

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone,

I recently got a new tattoo, which I love. I had it done in Chinese calligraphy, top to bottom, right to left. There are 4 columns, 3 with 3 characters and 1 with 2 characters. Originally, I wanted to group the words in a certain way and I knew the punctuation wouldn't carry through, so here is the original tattoo idea:

科林和拿俄米在一起,永远 Colin and Naomi together, forever.

I think you see the problem already. Once the comma comes out, the grammar is technically incorrect. yongyuan should come before zaiyiqi if the grammar is to be correct without the comma. However, I didn't want zaiyiqi (together) broken up in 2 columns and I wanted the emphasis on forever. My question is this: is this a glaring mistake or can it be reasonably seen as proper even though the comma is missing (and shouldn't be there)? Also, if it is a mistake, I found another couple of phrases I could use to 'finish' the tattoo, but it would put the characters on my breastbone...very painful. Here they are:

科林和拿俄米在一起永远幸福快乐 Colin and Naomi together forever happy (I know the xingfu and kuaile are close in meaning but it would fill out the last column on my chest)

科林和拿俄米在一起永远快乐 Colin and Naomi together happy forever

Suggestions are welcome and thank you all in advance for your time.

Take care,

Colin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

is this a glaring mistake or can it be reasonably seen as proper even though the comma is missing (and shouldn't be there)?

In my opinion, it is not a big deal if you omit the comma. That's what one should do when it comes to inscription of Chinese.

科林和拿俄米在一起,永远 Colin and Naomi together, forever.

In Chinese, there are set-phrases to express "together forever".

e.g.长相厮守、永世不离、长/终/永相伴、长/终/永相随、长/终/永相依、永结同心、百年好合;

and if I were you, I would not translate the names.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Peter,

Thank you for your reply. I probably should have known better since I am learning Mandarin and the time modifiers usually precede actions or states. However, I had something set in my head and went with it. Honestly, I love the way it looks. However, I am a perfectionist and that does not go well with art :)

Would you recommend I get a few more characters and complete it? I know that the phrase 在一起永远 can go before a few different things (like 不分离, 不会寂寞, 幸福快乐...etc.) but I don't want to compound a mistake further since my grammar is not that advanced (I could only pass HSK I or II right now). Perosnally, I like 在一起永远幸福快乐, but I know that Chinese abhors some types of repetition.

Anyway, thank you for your reply; it is much appreciated.

谢谢,

科林

Link to comment
Share on other sites

While the sentence you're thinking of is pretty much correct, are you sure you want a line that's basically something a first-year student would write in his exercise book inscripted on your chest forever? You're actually learning Chinese, so it's not entirely out of the question that someday you'll go to China, where you'll get embarrased looks from your Chinese friends when they see what you did to yourself.

Please wait a few years with this. In a few years, your Chinese will be better so you can come up with a more beautiful way of saying this; if you & Naomi are forever together, you'll still be together by then; you'll have time to find a Chinese tattooist; and you'll be able to tell whether the tattooist's writing is any good.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

time modifiers usually precede actions or states

That's true, you'd better complete it.

I like 在一起永远幸福快乐

it's grammatically ok. But 幸福 will be broken if you do that. And the whole sentence is a little plain for a tattoo IMHO.

How about "科林和拿俄米长相依永相随"? 长相依 means "lean on each other forever" and 永相随 means "be together forever"

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I want to thank everyone for their replies; I appreciate people taking the time to help. So, it appears I have three options: leave it as-is and explain I removed the comma due to the calligraphy, add a comma or heart (neat idea) or complete it. But it appears that I need some help on the charcters to complete it (since Peter is right....幸福快乐 is a little plain). So, with the following, what would complete the sentence in 4 characters maximum (to keep my pain down and symmetry correct)?

科林和拿俄米在一起永远...

Thanks for everyone's time,

Colin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Peter and Yialanliu,

That is perfect and when I put the calligraphy on my chest, the symbol for love is centered on my breastbone below my throat. Thank you both for your time and consideration. This finishes the tattoo up perfectly.

I guess for background on the tattoo, my wife and I got married last year right before I had neck and back surgery (we're both almost 40; I had stenosis which was inherited). I came close to not making it through the second surgery. However, she stood by me during a very difficult recovery, and today I am back to lifting weights again. When I got the idea for the tattoo, I played with it for months. I wanted our names to be whole and not broken up, I wanted the word 在一起 to be whole and not divided, and years ago I saw the word 永远 in a heart, so when I asked what it was, I liked the way the word sounded and it stuck with me. Hence the original idea, 科林和拿俄米在一起,永远. I thought the emphasis on forever was appropriate given that I think I made it through everything because I didn't want to leave my wife behind.

So, after getting it just right (or so I thought) and after 9 months of learning Mandarin, I got it done. I knew the comma should not be there since it was calligraphy. I had it for around a month and I looked in the mirror one morning and thought to myself "something's not right." And then I remembered the rule about time modifiers going before actions or states. It seems commas are very important sometimes. I actually have no Chinese friends (but hope that changes) so I didn't know what to do. And that's when I came here.

Anyway, thank you; I like the phrase 科林和拿俄米在一起永远相爱 a lot. I will show it to Naomi when she comes home; for an extra $150, this will be well worth it.

I like these forums and will be around a lot more.

Thanks again,

Colin

I spent a lot of time getting the phrase to look just right before I had it done. I researched it for a while and got the best tattoo shop around to do the work.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and select your username and password later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Click here to reply. Select text to quote.

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...