Mature student studying in China

[thewamphyri]

I was told I was crazy too.. but maybe I am.

For me, it was very much the idea of turning my life on head that appealed. Have to say, of first arriving (the first week) I decided it was the worst idea ever, but I quickly made friends and now feel not going would have been the worst idea ever.

I admit, considering my age, "what are you doing!?" does cross my mind sometimes - but not enough to return (or cause loss of sleep) - yet.

Troy

[xidi]

Hi there!

Im most likely going to Shanghai this August on a 1 year Language scholarship. I am 21 years old. But it's more like I have lived past 30, believe me. So age really? It's about what you want to achieve. And I would like to say on a general note, yes you have a lot to consider...and I am not saying this because I am younger than you, I've always felt this way...You spend your life living on professions and what a person of your age, career has to have achieved, but we pay little attention to what truly fulfills one. I am actually supposed to be starting my 4th year of my university degree course, which is my last year. But I have decided to go to China and pause my studies of which I don't know whether I will have sponsorship to complete when I return. People speak against it that I will regret it etc but I feel my greatest regeret would be not to take the once in a life opportunity of a scholarship to China. It's a personal experience issue for me, I know this sounds crazy....but I think to myself if I lived the following year to acquire the 'prestigious' things, things expected of me which really do not uplift me personall, I achieve all that in the following year and the next I die..truthfully speaking I haven't achieved anything for myself. The house or job that I had and didn't really enjoy but did because of how societ has nurtured us, all that will remain when I'm dead. Whereas if I spent the following year doing what fulfills me,if I died in the next I would have achieved something personally for myself that I can take to my grave.

You've worked all these years really.......................

Perhaps explore other aspects of being a human being, beyond the formalities that have caged us.

And since you mentioned and I found it interesting, I hope you and your long life partner tie the knot....perhaps in China

[putonghua73]

You might search the forum for posts by Putonghua73. If I remember right, he was British and in his mid 30's. You might also have a look at posts by JenniferW who is a retired British lady who has studied Chinese a long time

Well remembered, abcdefg - except you flatter me, as I am older. 39 to be exact - clinging to my 30s by my finger nails.

My experiences are eerily similar: back at the start of 2010, the time at my previous company was coming to an end, and I handed in my notice for a multitude of reasons i.e. been at my previous company a long while, underpaid (after I returned from China in Autumn 2010, I was successful in my first interview for the only role that appealed and received a 45% pay increase), the role was changing to a more transactional one and I split-up with my then girlfriend 6 weeks before I was due to fly to Tokyo.

I had been mulling this decision over for a while because I wasn't happy with my job and my life in London, and I had a girlfriend living in Tokyo. After the split, I changed my plans and resumed my original idea of studying in China.

I had a 5 figure sum in the bank, and I was renting the other apartment room to my friend, so could cover my part of the rent, tutition costs and living costs in China for 6 months. Would have been more, but I lost 83% on the value of my RBS shares.

I went to a private langauge school becauase I wanted 1-2-1, and didn't want to live in a dorm. A more expensive option, but one that suited me. I met a wide variety of other students at the school, a large number have become friends and with whom we still keep in touch (although I did rage-quit from FB last year).

Before I arrived in China, I used GoKunming to find language / activity partners. I also met [Chinese] people in coffee shops including a very attractive 22 year old wearing a very short skirt, who sat next to me and introduced herself (the old 'place Chinese textbooks on table' working their magic again). We developed a friendship - just friends because my activity partner, whom I first go talking to via GoKunming became my then girlfriend 2 and a half weeks after arriving in Kunming.

First, let's discuss your situation. First and foremost, career. What can you put on your CV / resume that you have achieved that would make you an attractive candidate should you leave your company i.e. how easy would it be to find a similar role 6 months or so down the line?

Second, financial stability. Although you have a mortgage, sounds like you can easily rent out your apartment to cover your mortgate payments. Very smart. I intend valuating my apartment after I come back from Japan in October, with the intention of buying it and renting out the spare room, or indeed, both rooms, if I decide to give London the middle-finger salute next year.

Third, your fiancee. This is the biggest determinate - whether you can both negotiate a period for you to study in China, and for both of you to make the relationship work long-distance. A year is the very maximum that I would be separate from my partner (if I had a partner) because I have had 3 long-distance situations, the longest lasting 2 and a half years. I will NOT have a LDR again, unless we were both in the same country and any distance apart would be a maxmimum of 6 months.

If you do decide to stay for a year, then you and your partner need to agree on a holiday destination to spend time together. Every couple is different. I think that a strong relationship should allow someone to fulfil their goals, providing that both agree the boundaries, timescales and keep the communication channels open. I would warn you that if you have a preference for Chinese [Oriental] women, then buy some bromide before you leave.

I used to walk out of my language school everyday during break to grab a coke (30p at the exchange rate back in 2010 - be rude not to), and see an attractive woman, with long legs, very short skirt / hot-pants, and tubmling black hair, walk past, and I would catch myself looking up at the sky, mouthing "God! I LOVE this country!".

My Western friends ranged from mid 20s (including a very good friend of mine, she was 24 back then) to 40s/50s. I was fortunate that a group of good friends were 30s or mid 30s. My Chinese friends were 40s (then girlfriend) to late late 20s - except the 22 year old. As a Western guy (even mixed race, because it is unspoken that the standard in Asia is Caucasian - especially for meeting women), it was easy to meet people, providing that you put yourself out there and actively sought ways to be included in social situations e.g. language exchanges, Chinese corners, coffee shops, parks, etc. Activities that involved social interaction.

I actively encourage people to follow their goals - providing that they are smart about it i.e. work out a detailed plan that incorporates finances, career prospects, language acquisition goals and re-adjustment when you return. I've lost count of the number of posts on Lonely Planet on the subject of "Am I crazy to up-sticks and live in Japan?", when they have given no thought to uprooting themselves and/or their family, adjusting to a new culture, and expecting (ha!) to find employement.

Fortunately, from what you have posted, you sound like you have a lot of your plan worked out. If you do decide to study in China, feedback and let us know what option you decided to choose (language school, university), and what city / province. I studied in Kunming because I wanted a mid-tier city, relatively little pollution, good weather (not too hot or cold), and excellent language schools. I also love Yunnan province, so big win.

If I do decide to do another 6 months study in China next year, I'm thinking somewhere in Hunan or maybe Nanjing.

All the best with whatever decision you make.

P.s. Keep an eye on the exchange rate. It's heading in the wrong direction i.e. below 10 yuan to the pound.

[Vinny / 文森]

It's great to hear the experiences of some "mature" people who have taken the plunge!

To answer your question Johnny, about whether or not I am definitely going - like you, I have also had a few sleepless nights with this is weighing heavily on my mind. I have similar concerns about my career, finances (living off savings with no income for at least a year) and of course, being too old to do this. Also, all the hassle of having to rent out my apartment, sell my car, storing some of my possessions, and plunging into the complete unknown, and then wondering what will happen when I come back home (probably having to spend a lot of money on furniture when I return, and buy a new car, all while looking for a job and my savings could be depleted by then...ugh!),

On the other hand, this is something I've felt I've always wanted to and probably will regret it later in life if I don't. I worry a lot more than I should, and my savings should be enough to cover this.

Anyway, I am in the process of applying to enrol in a university. I can still change my mind and lose the application fee. I finish my employment in mid August and the university course begins in mid September, so still have time to ponder things (and more sleepless nights!).

[imron]

and probably will regret it later in life if I don't

There you go then. Hassle can be dealt with. Regret no so much.

[putonghua73]

Whilst I agree with Imron, I'm concerned about the "sleepness nights" element. I can understand that doing something completely outside your comfort zone can cause anxiety, and there are no guarantees that things will pan out as you might hope. That said, providing that you are smart i.e. you have a detailed plan, with contingencies and 'what if' scenarios, then you put the odds in your favour.

Create a detailed financial plan, that includes a line by line item of all your expenditure that you will require for your study, but also when you come back, including a minimum of 3-6 months to live off. Once you have that, you then have your savings target and your timescales for when you can afford to leave your current employment and commence your Chinese studies.

I didn't leave the vagaries of the exchange rate to chance in terms of tuition fee (accmmodation and food was included). I used XE.com to quote me a forward price for my tuition fee i.e. sterling to yuan conversion, before I arrived in China. Day to day costs I used an ATM (no biggie if exchange rate fluctuated) but I definitely wanted to make sure that my tutition fee (the bulk of my spending) was already covered. You can also use XE.com or Yahoo Financials to look at currency charts over the last decade to get a feel for trends.

To save you the hassle, the trend has been downwards for both dollar and sterling against the yuan since the Financial Crisis 2007/08. So I would ignore charts before 2007, because we're in a different world with different economic realities.

All the best, Vinny!

[Johnny20270]

I totally forgot about this post! Can't believe its been two years since I posted the original post. 

 

To give you an update: I sort of lost interest after being in China several times. Well I would rephrase that. I drifted onto other things but still had this unshakeable lingering feeling  in the back of my mind about moving to china. Didn't seem to go even after 2 years. So I quit my job last week, not particularly because I wanted to move to China but mainly because the monotony of London in life left me with this constant feeling "Is this in life for me, meet a girl, do the same corporate job for ever, marriage kids, death?". I think that its very easy to talk yourself out of it because practically no-one supports you, thinks I'm crazy etc. However, the crucial factor is that others don't see life through your eyes.

 

Strangely enough, I feel like I have aged rapidly in last few years and in a way its a worry that mentally I am declining in spirit. However one can't ignore ones inner voice for ever.

 

I have opted for private Beijing to study. The uni life is not for me at all so private study is the only option I think. Actually I don't really want to go to Beijing but I have a friend there and she can get me a local flat, away from the ex-pat area and by chance is a qualified Mandarin teacher (but not working at that now), so its a good compromise. 

 

 

Vinny, if you're still on this forum (perhaps not) what did you do in the end. 

[laogui]

Apologies to the admin for reopening an old thread, but I'd like to know how Johnny has gone since.

I've just signed up for an Airbnb apartment in Kunshan to look around.  I am sure I'd avoid BJ on cost and pollution grounds; someone here I saw from Shijiazhuang - that and Zhengzhou too I'd steer clear of.  Private in Suzhou, Nanjing or Kunming are on my list at the moment, supplemented with some Intermediate-Advanced courses in Udemy.  

 

Best luck to Johnny!

 

老鬼