Exaggerating the price of a gift

[pprendeville]

When it comes to gift giving in China is it customary to exaggerate the price of the gift? Reason I ask is because my sister-in-law requested we buy some Irish perfume for her boss. So off we went and bought some Irish made perfume for €20. Not too shabby. Sister-in-law plans on telling her boss the perfume cost €190. Is this typical behaviour?

[kdavid]

A lot of Chinese don't talk about the price of gifts they give, nor do they ask about those they receive. It's bad form. The gift, and its packaging, should clearly illustrate how expensive the gift is.

With that said, many will leave the price tag on the gift, or the receipt in the bag.

[jbradfor]

Sister-in-law is not very smart, and assumes her boss is unable to use the internet to look up prices. Or, if said boss really likes said perfume, and goes to buy some more, will realize the actual cost.

Another possibility is that sister-in-law was expecting gifts in a certain price range, and was hinting that you bought something too cheap, and is actually not going to tell her boss the price. You, as a foreigner, is no doubt very rich, and should be able to afford more and should stop being so cheap.

[WARNING: The last paragraph contains sarcasm and mocking of some Chinese's opinions about westerners. Take literally at your own risk.]

[skylee]

Why would the boss ask about the price of a gift? It is rude. It's the thought that counts. 物輕情意重.

[roddy]

The boss won't have to ask, it'll be volunteered. She might even put a fake price tag on it. Thoughts count, money talks...

This is why moon cakes get such fancy boxes - so you can guess how much it cost. Who can price an unpackaged moon cake?

[xiaocai]

I also think it will be quite rude. Unless of course if you intend to bribe your boss, then you give something the value is apparent, such as jewelries, luxury watches, famous Chinese alcoholic beverages (for example Maotai, which is very popular in China as a gift for some reason), etc. But the actual price should never be mentioned regardless.

I do leave the receipt in the bag if I buy clothes or electronics as gifts for my friends, so they can exchange in case I got the wrong size or the item breaks down while still in warranty.

[skylee]

bribe. I thought I misread again.

PS - which reminds me of a souvenir I gave my boss. It was a very ugly papier mache the I bought in India. My boss asked me if she could accept it (in my organisation a supervisor should not accept advantage offered by a subordinate because of the corruption implication.) I told her it cost nothing, which was true, but I guess actually she found that ugly thing repulsive. haha.

[kdavid]

It's the thought that counts. 物轻情意重.

I've been in China for almost six years now, and this is almost never the case with extended family you're meeting for the first time or business. It's all about the price tag.

My wife is the only one who thinks it's sweet when I buy her something cheap and sentimental.

[xiaocai]

One of the consequences of relying on autocorrection too much. I love this function but may have grown too dependent on it...

Yes, it depends. 礼轻情意重 is true among good friends. But giving expensive gifts to the family of your future wife is a Chinese tradition in some places. I don't think it is that necessary myself but if they do expect you to, then you just have to work it out. But if you are a girl, you don't have to give anything.

[liuzhou]

This morning I took a local bus for about an hour's journey across the city. To pass the time I indulged in some intensive eavesdropping, as you do. Nearly everyone's conversation referred to the price of something. The outrageous price of bean sprouts in the market, how much Ding Dong Dang's new car cost, how much his uncle paid for the new apartment and twice that again to turn it into something habitable, etc. etc.

When I was teaching, I'd introduce Shakespeare. The only questions students ever asked were "How much is a ticket?" and "How much does the Complete Works cost". Zero interest in the contents.

At family banquets, mama introduces each dish by announcing the price of each ingredient and how she managed to bargain the vendor down from one yuan to 9 mao. It only took half an hour.

At formal dinners I have been advised to eat dish X because it is not only delicious but cost X元, as if that were some indicator of quality.

I find most people totally money obsessed and it doesn't surprise me at all that someone would exaggerate the price of a gift, but it is still a pretty dumb thing to do. As jbradfor points out the boss may be able to check the real value. That said, I rarely meet bosses who know how to search the internet. It's only for using QQ and downloading movies, isn't it?

"It's the thought that counts" doesn't hack it in China.

[Guest realmayo]

In a country where there's so much copying and potential for accidentially buying fake stuff doesn't it make sense (in some way) to tell someone how much their gift cost, because otherwise they won't be able to guess ('looks expensive but maybe it's a cheap copy and he didn't pay much' or 'looks cheap but maybe he got conned and paid loads').

[jkhsu]

So off we went and bought some Irish made perfume for €20. Not too shabby. Sister-in-law plans on telling her boss the perfume cost €190. Is this typical behaviour?

I agree with others here that your sister-in-law is not doing a smart thing, especially if the boss is a white collar in a large city (and especially if the boss is a woman). I've noticed that the typical Chinese white collar female in a large city (Shanghai, Beijing, etc.) knows a lot more about International luxury brands and their prices than typical Americans. Also, inflating the price of the perfume that much would only cause her boss to tell others about it. Eventually, the real price will come out and what was intended as a gracious gesture from your sister-in-law can backfire. The best thing is for her is to tell her boss that this an authentic Irish made perfume and not mention the price. The fact that it's not made in China is all that matters. If her boss does ask about the price, the polite thing to say is that "it's a small thing, it's not that much" and leave it at that.

To answer your question, from my experience (mostly dealing with white collar types in Shanghai) inflating the price of a gift by 9x is not typical behavior at all in the scenario that you've described. What I've seen people do is buy luxury brands at an outlet in the USA for for maybe 2x-3x cheaper than it is in China. The recipient usually knows the reputation of the brand and the price of the item in China. To be polite, the gift giver often will say "it's cheaper in the USA" but won't mention how much cheaper. Because the gift was bought in the USA, it's assumed to be authentic.

At the same time, people do exaggerate and brag to save face. For example, a guy from a poor family gets married. Often times, the girl's family may exaggerate (to outsiders) what the guy's family has given them. Or sometimes, the guy's family will give some amount of money to the girl's family but the girl's family will return some portion knowing the guy's family doesn't have that much money. But when the girl's family mentions it to others, they won't bring up the fact that they gave back the money. This sort of thing happens a lot but it's usually in the context of families trying to save face. I'm sure there are other examples as well.

[gato]

Reason I ask is because my sister-in-law requested we buy some Irish perfume for her boss.

She specifically asked for Irish perfume?

[liuzhou]

She specifically asked for Irish perfume?

Scent of a Guinness.

[pprendeville]

Some fantastic material in this thread. Have to laugh at some of the repliesespecially the one about listening to conversations on the bus. Hard not to do that. Gives a great insight into the culture also. I might actually do a presentation on this tpoic in college next year.

Kdavid: The gift was wrapped so I'm not 100% if the price is still on it although unlikely as it's notcustomoary in Ireland.

Jbradfor: I am a very wealthy student with 3 kids and a student grant. Great sarcasm. Love it.

Roddy: Do you really think she'll volunteer the pice? My wife called her this morning and told her the wise thing to do would be to say something like don't worry about the price. It wasn't much (as suggested in the thread). Not sure if she'll take the advice. Good poin on the mooncakes. I hate those things. They go beyoned processing (at least the ones in the fancy boxes). I almost feel guilty recycling those boxes they're so nice.

Xiaocai: Similar story here when buying gifts like clothes/electronic goods. Leave in receipt in case receiver wants to change. Have given a lot of money to in-laws in past when we were working (recession hit hard and both of us lost jobs) but can't afford to anymore. This is something I don't mind doing once I know the money is being used sensibly. If I thought it was being abused it wouldn't happen. I like to think I'm a logical person.

Liuzhou: That price thing really drives me mad. Parents-in-law are kinda like that as well and I just have to smile and grit my teeth when I hear this (mostly happens in front of people of some standing in the town/village). I find this whole concept very irritating and it leads my to distrust people who practrice this.

jkhsu: agree with this idea. I don't think Irish perfume is a big world player so price would probably be hard to find. I believe the boss woman requested Irish perfume so I imagine she's looking for something unique and the price, as such, isn't as important. If you ask me, the smell of it would be more important. I understand the saving face part. That's a good part of the culture.

Gato: Yes she asked for Irish perfume.

[frankwall]

Irish perfume certainly isn't a big world player. I'm curious, what was the brand even called? A bottle of whiskey would be a much more typical present from Ireland. And in terms of price, saying €190 is too much...maybe go for something more believable like €40 or €50. Its like when an average C+ student forges his exam paper and puts in A+. People get suspicious

[abcdefg]

#10 --

It's only for using QQ and downloading movies, isn't it?

The internet is also for playing the Happy Farm game 开心农场。

[pprendeville]

not sure what brand it was. as you say Irish perfume isn't big. like the comparison.

[gato]

Is it this one? Kind of a Irish French hybrid.

http://www.perfume.ie/innisfree-eau-de-parfum.html

Innisfree eau de parfum

[mcgau]

A year ago when I was in a small village, some villagers questioned why I smoked a cheap pack of Zhongnanhai which, in their opinions, don't seem right for me. I switched to hand roll my cigarettes with some tobacco from France and Germany, only because they're cheap. People were curious and asked how much I paid. It was RMB30 (enough to roll for 4 packs) but I said it's RMB300. Everyone was impressed and amazed. I was always asked by my friend to roll some to serve his clients and it rocked my friend's place! RMB300! It's even more luxurious than Panda (a brand) and Yinxiang (another brand). The response was so funny.

A a day I left, I told my friend the real price. He told me not to tell anyone else and he ordered a box of those cigarettes for himself.

I think the money-oriented society actually encourages you to exaggerate the price.