你好吗？

[Lu]

 

I find the term "免貴" extremely strange.  But perhaps it is just me.

I learned it at BLCU, a long time ago, so it might be northern, or a bit old-fashioned, or somewhat textbook-ese? I don't recall ever hearing 我小姓張, but that might be just me (or the people I am in contact with).

[imron]

免贵姓...

Is quite common and normal - at least in northern parts of China where I lived (Hebei and Beijing).  It's generally considered a polite way of replying to 您贵姓.  Working in an office where people take phone calls, the 您贵姓 and 免贵姓… combinations are heard regularly.

[skylee]

I use 你好嗎 occasionally. 貴姓 too, usually during phone conversation. I've heard 小姓 used IIRC usually by salespeople like those selling insurance. I have never heard 免貴姓

[gato]

A funny discussion about this here:

http://m.xici.net/d166168867.htm?pn=1

最近接到很多电话，自报家门的时候，总是说“我免贵姓..”

愁死了。哪有说自己是“贵姓”的

看来社会要普及基本知识啊

[imron]

A funny discussion about this here:

7楼 has it right.

[skylee]

Now that I think more about it, 貴姓 and 小姓 sound exceedingly polite. When I ask for someone's name, I would usually say 我該怎樣稱呼你 or 可不可以告訴我你的名字. 小姓 sounds just too humble.

I stayed in a cheap hotel in Lyon last month. Every time I returned to the hotel and asked for the key to my room at the reception, the clerk would ask me, "Who are you?" It sounded very rude to my ears. But based on what I heard during the check-in process, I knew the clerk was not that good in English (though he probably would disagree) so I did not take offence. And it was France.

[Lu]

 

When I ask for someone's name, I would usually say 我該怎樣稱呼你 or 可不可以告訴我你的名字.

I agree that that usually works just fine, but as your Lyon example shows, it can be very useful to know how to be really polite.

[roddy]

劳驾 I think I've heard but not sure where - I suspect when someone needs to get past and also be very polite, maybe a shop-assistant moving stock through a crowd of customers? 

[tooironic]

I can't recall ever hearing 劳驾 in the wild, though that doesn't necessarily mean it isn't used from time to time.

That reminds me, just last week I was on the Taipei metro with a friend. My first time in Taiwan, I noticed how polite the passengers were, saying 借过，借过，谢谢 every time they wanted to get off out of the crowded carriage. I commented to my Taiwanese friend that I never recalled that level of politeness in mainland China, and that all I ever heard was 让开！让开！ He said that a word like that is considered quite rude in Taiwan. But that's just the tip of the iceberg on the differences between the Strait...

[imron]

Here's a real world usage example of 你好吗：I regularly catch a tram where I live, and from time to time I bump into an elderly Chinese lady who catches the same tram and who knows I speak Chinese (she saw me reading a Chinese book once and we struck up a conversation).

Anyway, it had been a few months since we'd last bumped into each other, and then just yesterday we were on the same tram. After saying hello, exchanging pleasantries and talking about how it had been several months since we'd last had a chat, she turned and asked me: 你好吗?

Which is fairly consistent with other real world usage I'd experienced, which is that it's more often used when the speaker genuinely wants to know how you've been, rather than just a generic greeting.

[skylee]

Re the comments at #29, I agree completely.

I was in Beijing last April and I felt that things had improved, especially that guy at Pacific Coffee Company but that was not a common case. It might have more to do with staff training.

It is nice to be in Taiwan, which is one of the reasons why I go there often.

[Kenny同志]

I commented to my Taiwanese friend that I never recalled that level of politeness in mainland China, and that all I ever heard was 让开！让开！ He said that a word like that is considered quite rude in Taiwan.

 

It's rude on the Mainland too.

 

It seems that our experiences are quite different. In mine, people may not say 借過 as often as Taiwanese, but 對不起, 請讓一下 is pretty common.

 

Edit: An alternative to 對不起，請讓一下 is 麻煩讓一下.

[imron]

On the Beijing metro it's quite common to hear people ask 下车吗 to people in front as a way to ask them to move out of the way. Obviously this only applicable when getting off.

[skylee]

I agree with #33. It is also applicable to buses there.

[Lu]

 

On the Beijing metro it's quite common to hear people ask 下车吗 to people in front as a way to ask them to move out of the way. Obviously this only applicable when getting off.

I rarely heard anyone saying 借過 or 請讓一下, people on the Beijing metro usually just push you out of the way, but this one habit I've always appreciated. People on crowded public transport elsewhere could actually learn from this habit of asking 下嗎. It's not really the same as asking someone to get out of the way, because people planning to 下 can just remain in front of the door.

[Messidor]

请问您贵姓? literally means what's you respectable name plz, it's just a phrase to show respect but doesn't really mean someone's name is respectable. So the appropriate answer is 免贵姓…which literally means (my) unrespectable name is... ; "我" in "我免贵姓" is verbose. I'd never heard people in mainland say 小姓… and I can only find unreliable explanations online state that it the same with 免贵姓

@skylee

[Kenny同志]

A bit clarification:

 

甲：先生貴姓？

乙：免貴，姓吳。

 

Not 免貴姓，吳.