You'll never believe these 8 incredible signs your Chinese teacher isn't very good

[roddy]

Right, there's now no way this can't go viral. I wonder if buzzfeed.com.cn is still available...

 

I was sitting in a London cafe the other day next to a middle-aged businessguy getting a Chinese lesson from his teacher. Frankly it wasn't very good. I was seriously considering having a word with him and pointing this out, but I left before the teacher did. 

 

Here's some of what was wrong.

 

1) No pronunciation correction at all

 

Oh, you have an affidavit from 汉办 that your pronunciation is perfect? Even your tones, huh? Yeah, well they hand those out with cereal boxes. Unless you're a miracle, your pronunciation is going to need constant and incremental work. Even if you can speak flawlessly, you'll slip under pressure and you need called out on those slips. Not intrusively, not interrupting you while you struggle with a new construction, but you need to be made aware of it. This guy had obviously been allowed to coast too long with 'good enough for teacher' pronunciation. 

 

Minimum you want to be told what's wrong ("Your zh- sound is off"). Ideally you want to be told why ("you're starting the second tone too high"). 

 

2) You're having trouble with this sentence? Here, let me help you with that...

 

T: What are you going to do tomorrow?

S: ...

T: I...

S: I...

T: am...

S: am...

T: going...

S: going...

T: swimming?

S: swimming!

T: Very good!

 

Maybe acceptable with a new construction you're not sure how to put together. For almost every utterance? Without putting together the whole thing yourself at the end? Naughty teacher. If you're not producing fluid Chinese under your own steam, something's wrong. Maybe the class is above your level, or maybe you've never actually been made to do it, so you can't do it. 

 

3) Say yes, then we'll move on. 

 

This is one of my favorites

 

T: Understand?

S: Yes

 

You cannot rely on people telling you they understand something. They might just think they understand. 

 

T: Where I come from summer is very dry. Dry, do you understand?

S: Yes. [thinks dry means hot]

 

versus

 

T: Where I come from summer is very dry. What's the opposite of dry?

S: Cold?

T: No, dry means there isn't much rain.

S: Ah, wet!

 

This is a nasty one, as you end up with both teacher and student acting like progress is being made. And maybe it is, neither of you actually know. 

 

4) Teacher talking time

 

There shouldn't be so much of it. Explanations and instructions should be clear and concise. Yes, listening to a native speaker is valuable, but that's why BLCU invented the cassette tape. Being a beginner doesn't mean you can't talk, it just means you need to talk repetitively, about a limited range of topics. We call this practice. 

 

5) Constant praise

 

"Very good" when you've done something very good is useful information. "Very good" at the end of every utterance you make is utterly devoid of any value whatsoever. She might as well be coughing.

 

"Good, but a little faster next time". "Grammar was perfect, but what happens with two third tones?" "Ok, but we learned a word last week that would be better, can you remember it?"

 

If you want unconditional love, hire a puppy. 

 

6) If you aren't exhausted, it isn't working

 

This is not to suggest you should be walking out of class and collapsing. Not every class, at least. But language learning means an almost constant process of doing things you aren't good at, that you need to concentrate on, and that's hard. It also involves risking making mistakes and pushing yourself to do things the hard way. And that's hard too. 

 

If you're finishing your lesson feeling refreshed and ready for the rest of the day - are you being pushed hard enough? Are you pushing yourself hard enough. 

 

How does your body feel after a work-out? Your brain can feel like that too.

 

Obviously you can't be working all-out, all the time. A good teacher will be aware of where your energy levels are, how enthused you are, and respond accordingly. If you're fading and frustrated after a discouraging listening piece maybe you'll get some easy vocab review. But if the listening piece was actually pretty easy and you're pleased with yourself, maybe she'll start discussing the contents with you and push hard on your speaking standards.

 

7) Teacher, you're the only one who understands me.

 

It's important to have a soul-mate in life. Someone who gets you. Someone who finishes your sentences, who knows what you're trying to say before you've even figured out what to say, thus saving you the tedious task of saying it.

 

This person should not be your Chinese teacher.

 

Your Chinese teacher is used to hearing people mangle Chinese. She is getting paid to sit there and is therefore infinitely patient. She knows all the words you know and can probably have a good guess at what you're trying to say.  She adores you. You are her unique Chinese-learning snowflake. 

 

But what about the rest of the world? Do you find yourself getting blank looks and confusion when you say things you're sure your teacher would understand? Then we have a problem. 

 

At some point you're going to have to jump in the taxi of a taxi-driver who's having a bad day; persuade a visa clerk with a migraine to help you; or ask a favour of your boss as he rushes out the office. You are not their unique Chinese-learning snowflake. You are one more demand, and you cannot rely on patience and understanding (ok, actually you often can, which is testament to the fascination of Chinese people with foreigners who learn their language. But let's do them a favour and not expect it of them)

 

This is not to say that patience and understanding are not to be fostered in the Chinese teacher. But do not let yourself be molly-coddled. Require rigor also. 

 

8.) Incorrect Corrections

 

It's correct to be incorrect. Like I said above, learning a language is hard, you'll often be working at the edge of your abilities, and as such you'll often trip up. Words will fall out in the wrong order. A pronunciation error you thought your tongue had licked will reappear. You'll become very familiar with a feeling of "Oh, I knew that was wrong."

 

You do need to be made aware of these. But when it's something you've studied before, you shouldn't get corrected. You should be made to correct. A raised eyebrow, a small cough, a stern expression - your teacher should have some way to indicate that you've just gone wrong, and you're going to need to think quickly, figure out what it is, and get it right. This is infinitely more effective that being told what you've done wrong and moving on. You end up taking responsibility for your own language.

 

If you struggle to do so, you should get hints and, without too much delay, the answer. Some mistakes can be overlooked, as you're concentrating on something else. But if something's worth correcting, and you should be able to correct it yourself, you should get the first shot at it. In classroom situations, the student who made the error should get first shot, then it should be thrown open to the class, and only finally should the teacher explain, if still necessary. 

 

 

 

 

That's all I can think of. Others? Do you recognise your teacher? Or even yourself? And go on, everyone, tweet this on Facebook. 

[Koxinga]

I don't have a teacher, but I've had various people, including teachers, help me out.

 

It annoys me to no end when I ask if something is correct, and they answer something along the lines of 已經很好了 instead of 我看/聽得懂你的意思,但說ZYX比較好. I often have to follow up with 臺灣人平常會這麼說嗎?

 

One day I will be able to afford a real teacher

[roddy]

Maybe you can just change your question? Instead of asking "Is this correct?" ask them how they'd say it first. Ideally, before you've said anything in the first place, so they don't just say "Oh, we say what you just said."

[xuefang]

Sent to Facebook, waiting for it going viral and Chinese-Forums becoming the best known forum out there... wait! Isn't it already!

[Koxinga]

roddy, if I don't tell them what I want to say, how would they know what I want to say in the first place?

[roddy]

A: When the bus is busy and I need to get off, I say 'Excuse me, please let me past'. Is that right?

B: I guess. People will understand you.

A: Hey, if you're on the bus and it's really crowded, what do you say to get to the door?

B: Hmm, let me think. I guess we'd say...

or

A: Man, the bus was really busy today and I couldn't get off at my stop. It was embarassing, I couldn't think of the right thing to say...

B: Oh, you should have said...

There's still a tendency to give foreigners more polite language than is actually used, but you can at least stop them confirming your best guesses. And this is a bad example, as the obvious way to do this is to listen to what other people on the bus do.

[Guest realmayo]

Best one-on-one teacher I ever had wrote down everything new he taught me, then for the next lesson prepared a bundle of questions requiring me to reproduce those things. Very motivating, partly because I knew that he had spent time between the lessons working on it, so I felt obliged to take notes of what he taught me during the class and then revise them before the next one.

[Ruben von Zwack]

I would totally post it on Facebook, pin it on pinterest, and share it on tumblr, just one little thing, could you songify the dialogues? Or is songify so 2012 already... Then instead, maybe we could get a Bad Laoshi meme?

 

Ohh, actually I have one to add:

 

8.)  Using English words here and there when talking to me, the student, in Chinese sentences. Why???

[Lu]

9) 'We just don't say it that way' or not explaining why a certain particle is in this sentence.

Ok this is actually me, with my current language exchange. I did warn her before we started that I am not a teacher and won't be able to explain the finer grammar points to her. I'll keep this list in mind, see how I can improve what I do. (She on the other hand doesn't really study between our meetings, but that's on her.)

[ChTTay]

I think even the best teachers can make the number (3) mistake on occasion. It's an easy trap to fall into. My tutor has done it very occasionally but usually only when pressed for time or when she has veered far off topic. I can't remember the last time it happened only that it has happened.

When teaching, i have also caught myself asking this question then quickly asking follow up questions to check students actually get it.

[imron]

Right, there's now no way this can't go viral.

It just needs this..

 

Chinese teachers hate him!

[Ruben von Zwack]

 

PS - feeling not so creative today - maybe someone can do better than me:

http://memegenerator.net/instance/50250652

[hedwards]

@Roddy, I think most of that applies to just about any subject. Teaching language involves certain tweaks and techniques that don't always apply to other subjects, but this list pretty much applies to any subject.

 

Constant praise is mainly a problem when there's no correction going on and it's glossing over the mistakes being made. But in general there should be about 2 or 3 times as much praise as correction, at least until students have reached the point where they're conversing without too much trouble.

[Demonic_Duck]

Sequel suggestion: fix your tones with this one weird old trick the Chinese teaching industry doesn't want you to know.

 

8.)  Using English words here and there when talking to me, the student, in Chinese sentences. Why???

Ugh, I hate this. Normally the culprits seem to be grammar words, which I guess Chinese teachers just assume us students would never bother to learn.

 

More annoying still is when the teacher just uses an English word for a definition without trying to explain it in Chinese first. The worst is when s/he doesn't just say the word directly, but spells it out orally or writes it on the board, with the explanation “就是这个”. It seems like a half-assed and mildly patronising way to skirt around a "no English" policy.

 

That said, I think there's a place in the classroom for usage of English/other L1s when a) the class is beginner level, or b) the teacher has already tried to explain the word in question using suitably graded Chinese but has not been understood by some/all learners (for example, if a word used in a text is one that the learners don't yet have the conceptual framework to support in Chinese).

[hedwards]

@Ruben, the technical term for using English words in Chinese sentences is code switching and there's nothing inherently evil about it, unless it's being done too much and without any effort to stretch the vocabulary. Particularly early on when a student has a very small amount of vocabulary, it's often times more practical to spread the grammar around using filler materials so that the student can get a chance to try and express things that they don't yet have vocabulary to cover. Even just using sentences completely composed of English words using Chinese grammatical conventions has its place, albeit rarely.

 

I don't generally suggest doing that with students, but it's definitely a useful tool when you're looking to gain fluency when you're talking with somebody that knows some of your native language. You can focus on building the fluency and communicative competence rather than having to run back to the dictionary constantly or avoid talking about certain things. And often times, they can give you the correct Chinese word rather than one that translates more superficially.

[陳德聰]

Nice!

[Ruben von Zwack]

In my case, I meant the inherently evil

 

Does Shao Lan count as a Chinese teacher? I'm in a Meme frenzy now and digged up our topic about her TED presentation and book.

[Meng Lelan]

I was seriously considering having a word with him and pointing this out, but I left before the teacher did. 

 

 

Have a word with the teacher too. Would be a learning experience. 

[tysond]

Great article.  Couple of thoughts on how you, as a student, can help your teacher be better:

 

1. You can ask your teacher up front to do many of these things.  Tell them your priorities and tell them you want to be corrected.

2. Thank your teacher for doing what you ask.  If they spend 10 minutes correcting you in a painful way, say "oh that was hard but i think it's better now, thanks teacher". 

3. Try to laugh instead of being angry at yourself for being unable to do something.  That way your teacher will feel better about correcting you again and not feel like you are going to kill them.  Laughing from frustration is a feature of almost every lesson I have.

4. Once past beginner phase, try to get a teacher without good English (or who refuses to use it, which is even harder).  You want do do the entire lesson in Chinese as soon as possible, including grammar definitions, explanations of pronunciation etc.  It's hard the first few lessons but it will improve your listening and speaking enormously to remove the English crutch.

5. Establish your goals in terms of level so as to get the right sort of praise, discourage flattery by asking for feedback on how to improve.  Pay attention to graduated praise (my example sentences will get a "还好" if they use the grammar point correctly, and a “哦，真的非常好" if it's a nice natural example which has good intonation, uses some other grammar or new words, and incorporate a clever joke or idea). If I am not nailing it I will ask my teacher for an example or how to improve mine.

6. Thank your teacher for doing a good job.  If I get genuine praise from outsiders or workmates on my progress, I will bring it back to the teacher and thank them for teaching me.  

[abcdefg]

Good tips from @Tysond, above in #19.

 

I've had several teachers say things like 有点不太对 when I've absolutely butchered some new word, phrase or grammar point. Not wanting to offend is deeply ingrained by the culture.