How to address Chinese people

[ralphmat123]

Hello, so I started learning Chinese about 6 months ago and I know that Chinese people use their surname first (usually Wang, Zhang or Li) and they also have given names.

My question is, do you always address someone by their surname in Chinese? I know that you can say 'Mr Wang'- Wang Xiansheng for example. But if you meet younger Chinese people that are the same age as you, what do you call them? Their surname or given name? Otherwise I can imagine a situation when someone says Wang around a crowded table of Chinese people and 3 or 4 people all say 'yes?' haha

 

Thanks.

[tooironic]

You do not always address a Chinese person by their surname. In fact, you pretty much never just use their surname by itself. You either address a Chinese person by their given name, full name or position in society.

 

So, for example, if you knew a man named 张罗刚, you could call him 罗刚, or 张先生 if he was an adult. He might also have a 小名 like 小刚 which he prefers to go by. If he was a teacher you would call him （张）老师; a doctor （张）医生; a taxi driver, masseur or other professional 师傅; a boss 老板; a leader in your company 张总, etc. If he was a close friend you could call him your 哥们儿. And of course if he was in your family you would call him by his position in the family, e.g. 叔叔, 爷爷, etc.

 

These are just some examples I can think off the top of my head. As you can see it gets a little complicated. When in doubt, try to use their full name if you know it. If you're not sure how to address them you can always ask 你怎么称呼？

 

Edit: I forgot to mention, if they answer that question with just 我姓张/王/李/etc. you can address them as 老张/老王/老李/etc. if they are older than you, or 小张/小王/小李/etc. if they are younger than you.

[abcdefg]

Otherwise I can imagine a situation when someone says Wang around a crowded table of Chinese people and 3 or 4 people all say 'yes?' haha

 

I was once waiting to get on an EVA flight to Taipei in a boarding lounge at LAX (Los Angeles.) One of the gate agents made an announcement over the PA system, "Would Passenger Lee please come to the front."

 

You can imagine the surge that resulted. A human wave.

[qinbangzhi]

just call  their surname.

[889]

Don't use 哥们儿 unless you really -- really -- know when and how to use it.

The best approach is to listen carefully and pick up on how other people of your standing address a particular individual. There are too many approaches to generalize.

By the way, how do you like to be addressed in Chinese? There's usually a reciprocal aspect to naming conventions.

[abcdefg]

By the way, how do you like to be addressed in Chinese? There's usually a reciprocal aspect to naming conventions.

 

You have made your point very well, @889. I have no hesitation in answering your question with, "It depends completely on who is addressing me."

[imron]

just call  their surname.

This is rarely appropriate.

[ralphmat123]

So how you differentiate between people of the same family? For example if you're invited to the house of the family Wang, surely technically each family member had the same name: Wang?

[liuzhou]

 

So how you differentiate between people of the same family? For example if you're invited to the house of the family Wang, surely technically each family member had the same name: Wang?

 

No. Mr Wang's wife will probably have a different family name. Her parents will possibly live there too and her mother will have yet another family name. Similarly Mr Wang's mother, who may live there will have yet another family name.

 

Anyway, as has been pointed out already, you shouldn't refer to people just by their family name. It is impolite.

[Guest realmayo]

if you knew a man named 张罗刚, you could call him 罗刚

 

I'd thought this would indicate a lot of closeness between you two, but perhaps that's something I've read that doesn't really happen in real life?

[Shelley]

I don't think calling someone by there surname alone is polite, it certainly is not polite in English.

 

Maybe among my friends it can be used as an affectionate nickname but it is not for strangers to use.

 

if you are going to interacting with this person regularly why not ask them, you could say something like "Please call me XXXX, what would you like me to call you?"

[bande]

I think it is best to assume that every person has a title and to use that title. If a person is older, then this is especially important. If they are close in age,sometimes they prefer an English name or the whole name. It's important to find a trusted informer to give you these hidden cues. Actually, a book about title protocol would be very helpful.

[johnk]

Hi,

Kind of off topic here, but ...

Last Thursday I drove my former Chinese teacher and her 2 year old to visit a friend in another town. The two women each had a young child and they were having a baby clothes swap session, a good gossip and they were arranging for the children to play together.

 

I was intorduced to this new Chinese woman as 叔叔 and my teacher said that her daughter also called me 叔叔。This  woman looked at me  -- I am in my fifies with grey hair, and then said that her daughter should call me 爷爷。

 

It was interesting to see that the two children were encouraged to refer to each other as 茜茜姐姐 and 妞妞妹妹.

 

So I guess titles are important.

[889]

The day you realize you have suddenly changed from a shushu to a yeye is a landmark on your China journey.

In most cases I would not ask someone his naming preference directly. It might put him on the spot. What's he going to say? "Why, everyone calls me Wang Jingli. Even my wife."

Best to follow the standard Chinese approach and ask a reliable intermediary.

[fanglu]

Interesting anecdote. A non-Chinese politician I work for recently asked how he should address (in English) a certain Chinese politician. After debating the issue for literally weeks, we recommended (on advice from someone who would know) that he should address him as [first name] (my view, incidentally, was [last name] [title]). On the day, he did indeed address the Chinese politician as [first name], however, the translator on every occasion translated this into Chinese as [last name] [title]. Quite amusing, I thought.

 

So, the question of how to address Chinese people comes up for everyone.

[Lu]

I wonder: assuming that the non-Chinese politician was indeed in a position to address the Chinese politician by his first name (which he probably wasn't, but let's assume), would the translator be able to use the first name in translation? I think most translators wouldn't do that, because it would feel like they personally call their boss by his first name.

As to 叔叔 -> 爷爷, for women the 姐姐 -> 阿姨 change can be shocking :-) Personally I don't mind, but that's probably me.

[Demonic_Duck]

In most cases I would not ask someone his naming preference directly. It might put him on the spot. What's he going to say? "Why, everyone calls me Wang Jingli. Even my wife."

Best to follow the standard Chinese approach and ask a reliable intermediary.

 

I'm confused as to why asking the person directly would put them on the spot. That gives them a chance to explain what they'd like you to call them, rather than what most people do call them (not always the same thing). At least, this makes sense for relationships where you're socially on a similar "level" to the other person (new colleagues, friends of friends, partner's relatives etc.). You're probably on the mark with 王经理, though...

[889]

Exactly. If someone's unhappy that 40 years on everyone is still calling him by his childhood nickname, you don't want to raise an unhappy subject. Names can for various reasons be sensitive for some, so they're a subject I wouldn't raise with a direct "what would you like me to call you." Sounds too forward to me, especially to someone more senior in standing.

[imron]

怎么称呼你 is a perfectly ordinary and normal thing to say, and not in any way forward.

[Demonic_Duck]

If someone's unhappy that 40 years on everyone is still calling him by his childhood nickname, you don't want to raise an unhappy subject.

So... it's better to call him by the name he hates because everyone else does, instead of asking him what he'd prefer to be called? O_o