Random Gift Dilemma

[Melanie1989]

**Wasn't sure where to post this, sorry. Admins, please feel free to move it as you see fit.

 

Hi guys, 

I have a rather bizarre question for you tonight. Recently my partner and i discovered a very good Chinese restaurant and we've been going there a lot and have kind of become acquainted with the staff. They brought some (Japanese, haha) sweets for my daughter on one occasion and have suggested "higher quality" options from the menu.

 

My partner went in once for a takeaway and chatted a little with them while they were cooking. One of the two sisters spoke, or at least understood, his -even poorer than mine- Mandarin and said that they had visited Hong Kong. When my boyfriedn tried to ask if they were from the Mainland or Taiwan, they just said "China, China. I speak Mandanese" and seemed really confused, as of course they run a Chinese restaurant. This is going somewhere, i promise. He also mention that i was learning Chinese myself and they seemed fairly excited.

 

Anyway, a few days ago, they arrived at our door with two wrapped up Christmas presents for us. They had mentioned that they were going to China previously and, though it took a few days, my excitement got the better of me and i ended up opening the presents..... Only because i thought maybe it was something from China and that it would be something small and, well, a little flimsy seeing as we don't know them well at all.

 

Nope, turns out one was some sweet little children's chopsticks and a case for them and a very, VERY expensive-looking, beautiful little Chinese teapot. It was boxed in a prawn cracker box and filled with shredded newspapers from China. This is kinda the dilemma. 

 

This is obviously a very thoughtful gift, absolutely not the kind of thing you give out to every customer. How the bloody hell do we repay them? Yeah, they're obviously getting good custom from us, but i'd love to give them something really special because i'm just so taken aback. This means so much to me, i feel really shitty for opening them now instead of at Christmas.

 

I've read a lot about appropriate gifts to give to Chinese, lucky numbers etc and also what NOT to give as gifts but, seeing as i have never actually been to China, i'm not sure how much of that still stands. 

 

Also, it sounds like they might be from Mainland China, primarily as i've never heard of anyone from Hong Kong or Taiwan refer to themselves as Chinese, not that i'm an expert, again. All the newspaper shreddings are in Traditional and the menu is certainly Cantonese food. The menu also has Traditional characters. Does this sound like they are actually from China, or Taiwan? Purely cos i wrote them a Christmas card in Simplified Hanzi (before they gave us the gift) and now i feel like i might have offended them by using simplified if they aren't from the Mainland.

 

I'm sure i'm over-thinking this, but i just don't want to offend them.

 

Mostly, i would just like some advice as to how to give them a gift that won't make them feel unappreciated or dismissed or anything like that. What means a lot to Chinese people these days? I was thinking some nice tea or wine but then i'm thinking surely England wouldn't have anything that even compares to Chinese stuff?

 

Ugh. I'm off to bed. I have an early start tomorrow but this is keeping me up, over-thinking things. But any advice is appreciated. Thank you so much if you have managed to read this all the way through and i have a whole world of thank you's coming to anyone who can offer an opinion. 

[roddy]

First off, I wouldn't assume the teapot is all that expensive. China produces those things in massive bulk at not much cost. Something like this goes for £20 on ebay in the UK - what would the one you got cost bought from China? Probably nowhere near as much as you might think. 

 

And you certainly won't have offended anyone by using simplified instead of traditional. The newspaper could equally be from Hong Kong - perhaps your reading skills are good enough to have a look and figure it out ;-)

 

What to give them back is a little tricky. A common suggestion is some kind of local delicacy or handicraft from wherever you're from. 

[imron]

A common suggestion is some kind of local delicacy or handicraft from wherever you're from.

Unless the place you are from is famous for clocks.

[Shelley]

Why not clocks? sorry if this is silly question.

[skylee]

Clock = 鐘. To give a clock = 送鐘 ～ 送終.

[Melanie1989]

 

 

First off, I wouldn't assume the teapot is all that expensive. China produces those things in massive bulk at not much cost. Something like this goes for £20 on ebay in the UK - what would the one you got cost bought from China? Probably nowhere near as much as you might think. 

Ooh, that's a really nice tea set. The teapot might not be expensive, but it's still really sweet. It seems to be of better quality than ones i have seen over here, but either way the thought means the world. 

 

Also, i haven't studied Traditional characters at all (i was waiting until i actually began learning Cantonese), but i can figure most of them out, providing obviously i know the simplified. The paper is called the China Times or something (the header's in English, i just can't remember) but it seems to mention both Hong Kong and Taiwan, but mostly England. Well, Britain. With it all being shredded it makes it very hard to make full sense of it.

 

Thank you so much for the reply! Unfortunately though, i'm in Doncaster right now and it's hardly........well, i won't fnish that sentence.

 

@Imron -Clocks were already added to my list of no-no's! Haha, the last thing i want them to think is that now i have my pretty little teapot and Chinese paper clippings they can go die!

[Lu]

Firstly, you have not offended anyone. Taiwanese or Hongkongnese who would be offended at a well-meaning foreigner writing them a nice Christmas card in the wrong character set will be vanishingly rare, and also jerks, and also they wouldn't give you a nice gift in return.

I second Roddy's suggestion of getting them something from your hometown. Or perhaps you can make them something English (cookies or a cake or something, if you like to bake, for example). I also agree that the gift was probably not that expensive, but still a very nice gesture.

If you'd like to find out where they are in fact from, ask them where their 老家 is. If they insist 'China', ask them 中国哪里 (there's a thread on that, even).

[Shelley]

Thanks skylee, had to be something like that.