Traveling to China as a white female

[AngelFeathers]

Hey everyone. So currently I am a 19 year old girl attending my first year of university in Arizona in the united states. I was considered traveling abroad in some sort of program, maybe volunteering or helping to teach English. A lot of programs I found are in China or other parts of Asia like Thailand and Vietnam. However, one big thing holding me back from traveling to Asia is that I am afraid of standing out. For some reason, I have a big problem with being stared at and it makes me so uncomfortable. Sometimes I even have trouble going to my local Asian market because I stand out a lot. However, I really love Asia and there is so much I want to see there. So, I was wondering, will I stand out in China? What should I expect here, and do you think I would adjust to life here? Also, if you have any tips or other things to say about China, please feel free to say so. Thanks!

[stapler]

Long, long, long, stares and people yelling "foreigner!" at you - unless maybe you stay in the middle of Shanghai or Beijing.

[roddy]

On the plus side, it's often a sink-or-swim cure - either you'll get used to being stared at, or you'll go somewhere else pretty quickly. Maybe have a read of this too. 

 

It also depends a bit on what you look like. Same height as the average Chinese woman, dark hair, brown eyes and you'll get stared at a lot less than a six foot tall blue-eyed blonde. 

 

"unless maybe you stay in the middle of Shanghai or Beijing"

Actually the center of Beijing, meaning the tourist bits of Tiananmen, Forbidden City, Wangfujing, were often the worst for staring I found, as they were full of Chinese tourists from the provinces who were basically in town to stare at stuff and take photos of it. Actual people living in Beijing were generally too busy and too used to us.

[Lu]

Yes, you will stand out and be stared at. I'm afraid the only thing to do is to get over that, or ignore it. Some days or times this will be easier than others, but if you can't get over your discomfort you'll miss out on things and it'll be a pity. You have a perfectly good right to be in China and go about your business there, you're not doing anything wrong by it, and there's no need to let people staring at you discourage you.

 

Things you can do about it (to some extent): if people stare, I find it helps if you catch their eye, smile and nod in greeting. Often, they'll greet back and stop staring (or sometimes they stop staring as they're embarrased you noticed). If people yell 'HellOOOO!!', reply 'Ni haaOOOO!' in the exact same tone of voice. This sometimes makes them realise they just did something stupid, but it will always be amusing to yourself, so you win either way. Nothing can be done about the staring of babies, Chinese (and Taiwanese) babies are masters of staring and will not stop. Sometimes you can share a laugh about this with their moms.

 

The thread Roddy links to is useful, and there's another link in that thread to the scams thread, which is also useful. I hope you make it to China and have a great time!

[GotJack]

If you have a big problem with being stared at I would 100% steer you to Thailand rather than China 

[Guest realmayo]

Or Taipei.

[edelweis]

I don't like being stared at either, but there's a difference between:

 

1) Being stared at in my own country among similar looking people (what's wrong with me? is my hair acting up again? what's wrong with them? are they preparing to mug me?),

Or being stared at by people I know or people I can expect to meet again (is there gossip spreading about me? what king of opinion are they forming about me?)

This is difficult to stand and it makes me nervous and physically awkward, and in a bad mood for hours.

 

 

2) Being stared at by total strangers in a foreign country just because you look foreign.

As long as they don't look menacing, I can accept that some people are just fascinated with foreigners.

It has nothing to do with me as a person and since I don't expect to meet those people again, I don't care what they think or say about me.

 

There was one time in a Hutong public toilet (the kind with holes in the ground and low partitions) when some Chinese women stared at me incredulously - whether because I'm a foreigner or because of my awkward squatting technique I don't know. This is the kind of thing that would really put me in a foul mood in my own country. But in China, well, I was only embarrassed for a few minutes and then I laughed it out.

[Xiao Kui]

whether because I'm a foreigner or because of my awkward squatting technique

 

 

Definitely the former, has happened to me many times, and i am pretty dang good at squatting (ok, not that good, my heels don't touch the ground).  however, you even get used to being stared at in the toilet. since most foreigners avoid the public toilets altogether this should not be an issue, and at least half of them have private stalls nowadays lol.    

[twinmatrix]

If people yell 'HellOOOO!!', reply 'Ni haaOOOO!' in the exact same tone of voice.

 

I cannot imagine doing this at all. I will just feel super retarded. Does that actually work?

 

Honestly, I don't mind the staring. I do mind having people yell HelloOOOOOOO in my face but I just ignore them or stare back in their face.

Actually, it doesn't bother me. But if yelling NihaaaOOOOO back makes them feel stupid I want to try that. XD

[anonymoose]

If you go to Shanghai, you probably won't be stared at very much.

If you go to smaller places, not only will you be stared at constantly in public, you're also likely to have many people attempt to speak to you and want photos with you.

On the plus side, though, irritating though it is, most people do not bear any malicious intent. If I were a single woman, I'd feel much safer traveling alone in China than anywhere in the Middle East, for example.

[Geiko]

Off topic: I downvoted #6 by mistake (chubby fingers on my mobile phone, bad combination). Could someone upvote him?

[Lu]

I cannot imagine doing this at all. I will just feel super retarded. Does that actually work?

If it makes you feel retarded, feel free to not do it. Half the point of it is to make you feel better.

 

It can work though. I was in Sichuan in Sanxingdui (recommended!) when I walked past two girls and a guy sitting on a bench. 'HellOOOO!' yelled one of the girls. 'Ni haaOOOO!' I yelled back (that was the first time I tried that). The guy laughed at her, as in, he recognised she had been acting ridiculous. She looked a little abashed. I felt very good about this outcome.

[twinmatrix]

If it makes you feel retarded, feel free to not do it. Half the point of it is to make you feel better.

 

It can work though. I was in Sichuan in Sanxingdui (recommended!) when I walked past two girls and a guy sitting on a bench. 'HellOOOO!' yelled one of the girls. 'Ni haaOOOO!' I yelled back (that was the first time I tried that). The guy laughed at her, as in, he recognised she had been acting ridiculous. She looked a little abashed. I felt very good about this outcome.

 

Haha! That is awesome. I will remember that and might try it.

 

Am I the only one who loves having my picture taken in smaller local areas? Makes me feel like a (narcissistic) super model hahaha.

Yes, I know, I'm being objectified as a white person like an animal in the zoo, but whatever. XD

[carlo]

Learning the language will make you feel more at ease. You may still stand out, but you'll have the confidence of knowing what is going on around you, and react appropriately if necessary. I have been to places where I do not stand out as much as in China, but not understanding the language/ culture was far more stressful.

[zhouhaochen]

as long as you stay in the international parts of Beijing and Shanghai, nobody will stare at you - but the interesting China is what is outside those little expat bubbles, and staring will be part of it.

However, what usually interests Chinese people is not your skin colour (there are some pretty pale Chinese people...), but height (you cant do much about that, except maybe shoes), clothes (choose what you wear) and hair (especially long blond hair - a hat can go a long way in diverting attention there).

 

That is similar everywhere in Asia though. Places where there are a lot of foreigners nobody will care, but when you go to less traveled places (and most of China is very little traveld by foreigners) then you will be a novelty - how much of a novelty is at least up to a point up to you, depending on how you dress and behave.

[Mixia]

@10@15: I am in Shanghai and there are situations where I get stared at even in the busiest places. I am also speaking mandarin Chinese with locals.

Sorry, I got annoyed.

@OP: I didn't like being stared at either. Then I came to China and people stared. I got accostumed to it and I don't care so much about it now. I think it's good for me, since my self-confidence wasn't very good. Now I am in China. Peolpe stare at me, they are interested in you and they don't think you're weird. They just accept you.

I understand that you are unconfortable with being stared at and yes, it probably will happen- even in Beijing or Shanghai. But you just might loose your fear.

Go for it. You won't know until you're here.

Sidenote: according to my lonelyplanet China is very safe for single femaile travellers

[Simon_CH]

People in Thailand or Vietnam stare a lot less, if being the center of attention and constant staring trouble you I'd advise you go there. 

 

But you might just miss an opportunity to travel a really interesting country, as South East Asia is much easier in many regards. 

[imron]

I have a big problem with being stared at and it makes me so uncomfortable

You will be stared at in China.  The good thing is that as Roddy mentioned, there's a high chance that it will 'cure' you of this problem.