How to tell if you've been in China too long

[abcdefg]

Today was a friend’s birthday and several of us splashed out with a big deal dinner at Pizza Hut. After all it was a special occasion; no expense was spared.

 

At 5:45 the place was nearly empty; at 6:45 all tables were full and they were seating overflow upstairs. As we studied the menu, a lively debate broke out about whether to order the durian pizza or the squid and crayfish number. We didn’t bat an eye and had one of each.

 

We started with a big salad and of course it automatically came with Thousand Island dressing. What else could you want?

 

I started to make a fuss because there were no chopsticks on the table, but one of my Chinese pals shushed me and suggested that I struggle with a knife and fork instead.

 

Everyone at the table played with their phones nonstop while waiting for the food, occasionally showing around some popular pictures from their news feeds. When we got served it was foodie selfies all around before digging in.

 

And I sincerely thought the food was great and we had a real good time. Must have been in China too long.

[DavyJonesLocker]

My gf always orders the oddest of pizza, God forbid we order a pepperoni, BBQ beef etc 

 

Did you not get the customary Heinz ketchup?  Do people use knifes and forks in pizza hut? I thought that was for only the posh European style pizza places (aka practically nothing on the pizza and twice the price)

 

[abcdefg]

32 minutes ago, DavyJonesLocker said:

Did you not get the customary Heinz ketchup?  Do people use knifes and forks in pizza hut? I thought that was for only the posh European style pizza places (aka practically nothing on the pizza and twice the price)

 

Pizza Hut here is pretty posh. We had silverware and plates. Tab came to almost 150 RMB a head, way more than my usual budget. Could have a real fine hotpot for that. 

[DavyJonesLocker]

3 minutes ago, abcdefg said:

Pizza Hut is pretty posh. We had silverware and plates. Tab came to almost 150 RMB a head. Could have a real fine hotpot for that. 

 

That's the problem, pizza is pretty cheap in UK. Here it's the same price as a decent meal in a restaurant. Your post has tempted me. I'm going to order a dominoes in a bit . That will cost 90 or so for a 12“ not exactly expensive but goes far in a Beijing Restaurant . In UK 90kuai = £10 wouldn't barely get you a God awful Chinese takeaway with extra MSG.

 

Looking at the dominoes Chinese app , they have a new one 可可布朗尼比萨  coca Brownie pizza ? I think I'll skip that 

[歐博思]

I'm Team Pineapple for pizza, and the thought of durian pizza makes my stomach do backflips.

 

Funny they insisted on Western fork-and-knife for such an Eastern pizza.

[Alex_Hart]

34 minutes ago, abcdefg said:

Pizza Hut here is pretty posh. We had silverware and plates. Tab came to almost 150 RMB a head, way more than my usual budget. Could have a real fine hotpot for that. 

Funny you mention that. I just ate at 川味观, a popular hot pot chain. I ate enough that my jeans were about to burst, but the bill came out to around 100 kuai per person (with beers). I still think this is rather expensive - I've had it for much cheaper in other Chinese cities. Gotta love hot pot. 
 

I avoid Chinese pizza places like the plague, though. It isn't the durian that gets me. I have cooked serviceable durian pizza at home (girlfriend's request). It's the sugar-filled sauce and the Wonderbread crust. Gaaaah, it's like cake!

 

The crayfish pizza sounds kind of interesting. Was it 麻辣 flavor?

[歐博思]

11 minutes ago, Alex_Hart said:

It's the sugar-filled sauce

You actually got sauce!?!

[Alex_Hart]

3 minutes ago, 歐博思 said:

You actually got sauce!?!

You didn't? I've had it several times, though never at Pizza Hut; sometimes with a small schmear of tomato sauce, others with some sort of sweetened bechamel sauce. 

[Tomsima]

You know you've hit the jackpot when you go out for 'sweet and spicy durian hotpot', with a side of fruit salad (you know the one, with fruit drowning in salad dressing). Can't remember the chain name, its pretty famous for its durian hotpot though, sure some of you will know the one.

[mungouk]

5 minutes ago, Tomsima said:

'sweet and spicy durian hotpot'

 

?

[NinjaTurtle]

Pizza Hut  has a great lunchtime special, 30RMB, weekdays only. You get a personal pan pizza, small salad and a small soup. This is NOT on the menu, so you have to ask for it.

[anonymoose]

Maybe things have changed, but in my experience, Chinese pizza is terrible almost anywhere in China. I only know of one Italian restaurant in Shanghai that does decent pizzas, and the chefs are Italian.

[fabiothebest]

I'm Italian and I'm quite sensitive about "pizza". Let's talk about Chinese please

[Alex_Hart]

9 hours ago, mungouk said:

9 hours ago, Tomsima said:

'sweet and spicy durian hotpot'

 

?

?

 

Spoiler

Where do I try this?

 

[DavyJonesLocker]

10 hours ago, anonymoose said:

Maybe things have changed, but in my experience, Chinese pizza is terrible almost anywhere in China. I only know of one Italian restaurant in Shanghai that does decent pizzas, and the chefs are Italian.

 

If you're European especially Italian (@fabiothebest) and used to that style, you're right. It ranges from totally uneditable and warrants a post on we chat to demonstrate how bad it is to editable and just "ok" at best. Some places doesn't seem to understand that you don't delivery a pizza holding it  vertically! 

 

However here in Beijing , there are some good places, although few and far between. They are all set up by foreigners. Gung-ho pizza is exactly like a good Italian pizza. I have emailed there owners before.  Every ingredient is imported including the flour and especially the cheese (highly important), a flame based oven, adding on Italian or Spanish cured meets etc This of course adds a lot of expensive so more expensive than the USA chain stores operating in China. 

 

[imron]

16 hours ago, abcdefg said:

After all it was a special occasion; no expense was spared.

Looking forward to your next high-dining review - McDonalds.

[abcdefg]

I've yet to come across a fennel tofu pizza. Maybe I need to open a neighborhood pizza shop. 

[mungouk]

1 hour ago, DavyJonesLocker said:

totally uneditable

 

at least if it's editable you can edit out the Durian... ?

[DavyJonesLocker]

12 minutes ago, mungouk said:

at least if it's editable you can edit out the Durian... ?

 

 

haha I keep promising myself I will turn of swipe texting on my phone, but its just so quick! 

[XiaoXi]

On 12/6/2018 at 7:53 PM, abcdefg said:

At 5:45 the place was nearly empty; at 6:45 all tables were full and they were seating overflow upstairs. As we studied the menu, a lively debate broke out about whether to order the durian pizza or the squid and crayfish number. We didn’t bat an eye and had one of each.

You can eat the fruit pizzas? You certainly have been here too long. Especially durian. The only thing I could eat is pineapple but it has to be with something salty like ham at least to counteract. I can't believe all the fruit pizzas the Chinese tend to love, like just loads of bananas on top and that's it.

 

On 12/6/2018 at 7:53 PM, abcdefg said:

We started with a big salad and of course it automatically came with Thousand Island dressing. What else could you want?

Is it really thousand island dressing? The salads I had in the both the North and the South were some kind of insanely sweet salad cream. So sweet I couldn't even eat it.

 

So many sweet things in China, it's no wonder they have the highest rate of diabetes in the world now. Things seem to be getting sweeter and sweeter since it was only a few years back that we started seeing fruit pizzas.