People don't want to speak to me and Im dejected

[ChTTay]

When I was a beginner I found that situations where the person has no choice but to talk to you be most useful. As mentioned above, taxi rides were often fantastic. I was lucky that Yinchuan drivers were generally friendly/happy to have a rare foreign guest in their car. Even after they’d exhausted the 5 questions (all the classics) I understood in Chinese, they’d admirably keep going. 

 

Asking questions to my local fruit and vegetable stall also worked fairly well. At the end of the day, they want to sell me stuff so asking where it was grown, whats it called, how much is it etc was fine. 

 

Long train travel was good also. As someone mentioned, take a Chinese textbook to a public park, on a train etc and people might engage you. Old people in parks especially as they usually have little to do but pass the time. Security guards of your community can also be ok. Just start saying hello, good morning etc then gradually increase it if they seem open to it. 

 

I never found language exchange partners useful when I was a complete beginner. 

[Wurstmann]

1 hour ago, ChTTay said:

the 5 questions

What are they? For me it goes "Where are you from? Oh, BMW is nice. Hitler was a good dude." Followed by awkward silence because I don't want to argue with a random taxi driver. ? ?

[ChTTay]

Perhaps a set 3 with a couple on rotation. The set three were usually:

where are you from?

why are you here?

how much do you earn? 

Then perhaps something about age, liking China, being used to China/Chinese food etc. 

 

When I first started with Chinese I just learned these common questions with my tutor. As they came up so often people thought my Chinese was “good” but actually I just knew those ones! As you mention, they’d get confident and start asking about WWII or something and I’d be lost completely. 

[Lu]

I started really enjoying the taxi rides, both in China and in Taiwan, when I realised you can five-question them right back. How long have you driven a taxi? If not very long: what did you do before that? How much do you earn? Are you married? Do you have children? I got a pretty good idea of average taxi driver income in Taipei (about the same as my own at the time, except I didn't have to support a family on it), once in Beijing a story of how the driver negotiated down the fine for having a second child, and once in Taipei a conversation on the good or evil nature of humankind that was so interesting I asked the driver to wait for me while I picked up what I needed at my destination instead of just paying him and getting a new taxi for the way back.

 

44 minutes ago, ChTTay said:

The set three were usually:

where are you from?

why are you here?

how much do you earn?  

Then perhaps something about age, liking China, being used to China/Chinese food etc.

Don't forget 'Are you married? -> You should marry a Chinese guy.'

[StChris]

Come to Harbin! It's very rare to find someone willing to speak English. Even in university coffee shops and the like, the people working there always speak Chinese to me. It probably helps that the only white people most Chinese deal with here are Russians, whose Chinese tends to be much better than their English.

[Shelley]

I also wonder if there isn't some of "I haven't got time to spend trying to communicate with you, do you want to buy the socks or not?" They then show you the calculator with the price. 

 

Not everyone wants to or has the time to spend talking to a foreigner and having to work really hard to keep their language at a level you can understand or trying to decipher what you say. If your Chinese was so good that it was easy to converse in Chinese I am sure you would get more people spending time talking to you.

 

Just think how much talking you do with shop keepers, taxi drivers, etc at home in your own language, sometime when I am in the corner shop were I have been going for the last 20 years and know all the staff, we can have a laugh at the local goings on or discuss the latest news topic. Its all light hearted, quick and superficial. Sometimes I am in a hurry and they are busy so we don't do much more than hello, ok? yes, thanks bye.

 

I am not saying you should give up trying to speak to people but don't worry if they don't, take up the good advice people have given about making friends at sports clubs, libraries or what ever you like doing.