“After April 1” by 林夕

[studentyoung]

(Some words before you read: On April 1, 2003, the famous Hong Kong’s movie star, singer Lesilie Cheung 张国荣 committed suicide. As one of his best friends, 林夕 Linxi (林夕is a pen name, his true name is 梁伟文), one of the most famous lyrics writers in Hong Kong, wrote down the words as below to mourn for him.)

After April 1

(translated by Studentyoung)

I have been living in “debt” for more ten years, and always OWNING and OWING and OWING, owning the lyrics for his or hers.

It was so lucky that I wasn’t at this time, for all the lyrics in Lesilie Cheung’s last album allocated to me have been finished. Since he came back to music circle in 1995, I have composed numerous lyrics with various styles for him, spirited, touching, bewitching, blue, addicted, happy, sad, etc. In the flick of an eye 8 years passed by, and that’s the end.

It was so regretful that I still composed the last five lyrics in my usual style, which expresses a feeling of wandering in loneliness, not the one like “chicken soup for the soul”. The producer once reminded me no need to write too sad, but I didn’t put it in my heart and neglected Cheung’s mental need at that time.

I suddenly feel so guilty, for where the use for me to write down so many tear-earning lyrics?

Roland Barthes’ words in his “A Lover's Discourse”, “The existence of tears proves that sadness is not an illusion.” But does it really help the audience, if I prove the truth of sadness in the lovelorn? I still hope I can make amends for my fault by good deeds, that is, to sublime the power of happiness from each sad love song. And it is the biggest enlightenment for me after that “April 1”.

Substance will finally come to an end, but happenings will last forever. Especially music, especially lyrics, after the mother tape has been finished and the album released, it is really too late to revise.

I will always remind myself that no matter how busy it is, I should not write down those lyrics which make me feel regret afterwards. Because human being’s life is fugacious while the life of music is endless, we will never know in what time, the flowing fragment suddenly become a stop frame, only for you to playback, not to rephotograph…

Original text by 林夕:

4月1日之后

十几年来，我都活在负债的状态中，总是欠欠欠，欠这个那个歌手的歌词。

多庆幸这次没有。在张国荣最后一张专辑灌录过程中，分给我的词，我都写完了。从１９９５年他复出乐坛开始，我替他打造了大量不同风格的歌词，飞扬、缠绵、妖媚、忧郁、沉溺、喜悦、悲伤，转眼８年，至此画上了句号。

可遗憾的是，在最后的五首歌的歌词里，我依然按以往路线在感情世界中唱游，并没有写下一些心灵鸡汤式的歌词。监制曾经提醒我，别写太悲的东西，我也没特别放在心上，忽略了当时他心境上的需要。

我忽然很内疚，写下了那么多勾引听众眼泪的歌词，究竟对这个世界有什么意义？

罗兰巴特在“恋人絮语”的名句：“眼泪的存在，是为了证明悲伤不是一场幻觉。”但让我证明了失恋的真实，对听众又有没有帮助？如果发泄真有疗效，我更希望将来可以将功补过，在每首伤感的情歌升华出快乐的力量。这是４月１日后我最大的启悟。

物件会消失，事件却永存。特别是音乐，特别是歌词，母带完成，发片之后，要修改已来不及。

我会警惕自己，往后无论如何匆忙，都不可以写下让自己事后后悔的歌词。因为生命无常，音乐的生命却无限。我们永远不知道什么时候流动中的片段成为定格，只能重温，不容再造。

Thanks!